Most Women Fake Orgasms because Most Men Fake Foreplay. ~ Bella Bliss |
Today I read this quote in an article and found myself nodding yes to its raw truth. It is a shame that so many women have never experienced a man who could be present enough, last long enough or even have the understanding of what it truly takes to get a woman off. Over the last few weeks I have been blessed with this topic coming up repeatedly. One afternoon after our Orgasm Camp Workshop I was driving around town with my 80 year old mother. She had attended the Orgasm Camp workshop and was amazed at what she saw, witnessed and learned. She asked me if it was honestly possible for a woman to be in such raptures of orgasm as our model was in class or was the model just “faking it?’ I assured her that I knew first handedly that it was indeed possible and the way we women were designed, however due to many belief structures, our physical stress levels, our societal inability to fully connect and our focus on sex and orgasm merely being on the genitals and the friction between them that we hardly ever achieved this rapture. I then went on to discuss a recent love making event that I had had with a long term lover of mine. I shared with her how this man took the time to explore, play and arouse my whole being. Thanks to this man, I have grown to appreciate and understand that a mature man is not just in to sexing a woman so that he can cum, but more importantly that his pleasure is bi-product of her bliss. The more he can build pleasure in her and bring her not just to climax and orgasm but to fully surrendering to him, herself and the heartbeat of the universe, the more ecstatic bliss he experiences as well. This only happens though when a man is willing to take the time to lay the foundation. If he jumps into diving into her right away then she is far from being physically, emotionally, mentally or spiritually ready for the event and it turns into a broadway play instead, where she ends up faking it because she is quickly board and empty from the event. No longer even feeling attraction to her lover. Interestingly enough a few days later I witnessed a few episodes of just this happening. Pushing boundaries and wanting to educate myself I found my partner and self at a swingers club in Dallas. At first the couple’s were all shy acting, not connecting or mingling like I had anticipated, but then as the night went on, the majority of couples moved into the partiality private sexing rooms. Here is where I noticed ton’s of friction sex happening. Standing among the numerous hot scenes that were taking place I found myself going deeper into what was actually happening. These couple’s had gone from zero to 80 in less then 3 minutes and the women were going through the motions. This was obvious from their bored faces. Two scenes stood out to me the strongest: A woman was laying on her back naked with one man kneeling beside her, zipper down and cock in her mouth while another man thumbed around her vulva and flicked at her clit. She wiggled trying to help this man aim his fingers better and get the right pressure but soon the man who she was giving a blow job to came and quickly moved off the bed to zip his pants up. There she was a whopping 5 minutes into what could have been a hot threesome fantasy being acted out and one man was already down for the count. Not missing a beat the man who had put in 5 minutes of stumbling around her vulva without care was now taking her from behind and guess what 3 minutes later was zipping up his pants. She moaned and grabbed at he sheets beneath her so that her lovers would feel like they had accomplished something but her face and body spoke otherwise. Scene two: In the bed next to the above scene there was a woman laying on her stomach naked with her lover lover straddling her and penetrating her with great force and effort while holding her head down in an animalistic raw fashion as though he was fully taking her for his own, a man stand beside them watching and I am sure wishing to be part of this game. The man penetrating the woman was forceful, full of raw masculine energy but the woman again looked blank. Perhaps she was thinking about work she needed to get done the next day or items for the kids, whatever she was thinking about it was far from what her physical body was going through. Although she too moaned, made some faces and tightened her fists. Shortly thereafter a long, large groan came from the man and he pressed deep into her and was done. She popped up and acted like it was all good. 10 minutes of non-orgasmic, disconnected wannabee sexing. Both of these scenes could have been earth shaking, fulfilling, powerful events for all parties, but that is not the reality. If any of these men had just taken the time and energy to stroke her the right way, they could have been gifted with a woman turning into a true orgasmic goddess not just downloading zone for their ejaculation. And here we have the #1 issue in sexual relationships: He comes too soon, she can’t ever seem to get there so fakes it. Time goes by, distance grown’s and the relationship becomes sexless. Thus resulting in numerous issues. Sound familiar? I can assist you with this and so many other sex and relating issues that are common place in today’s world. As well as teach you how important having gourmet sex is to the chemistry of the rest of your life. If you are one of the people who believe that you have to have serious problems or trauma in sex in order to have sufficient use of a coach or educator then you need to read this article: 10 Things You Didn’t Know About Sex Coaching |