I am often so captured by fear, I cannot move forward.
There are so many time’s in life where I find myself just pausing, procrastinating and what is without a doubt stuck in FEAR. Some of these instances are actually silly, other’s are understandable. Some I cannot avoid the event sand steps that I most certainly will be taking while yet, other’s I just ignore and act like they are not even there.
It’s funny as I write this I come back to the feeling of being pregnant.
Not just pregnant but due any day.
Then I slip into the thought of the moments after my water has broken and there is NO TURNING BACK. Once that water breaks your just a few short moments maybe 30 minutes away from contractions happening for real.
The clock start ticking on reality.
You realize that your going to have a baby.
And in order to birth this child that there WILL be pain, blood, sweat and tears.
There will be terror going through your veins.
There will be uncertainty mixed with excitement.
In this MOMENT you realize, well sh*t, I am stuck now.
Now I have to move through this birth, this transformation and just go with it.
Funny thing, I always tried to control it for the first portion of the labor process. Always, trying to act calm, cool and collected, like I had everything in order was superwomen.
And the interesting thing was that for the most part I did.
But there were moments in this that I felt great pain,
tears wanted to stream down my face and few choice words wanted to escape my lips.
It was NEVER as bad as i thought it was going to be though.
It was NEVER as severe as I had painted in my head those few short moments after my water broke or event the days leading up to that.
I often thought, it was going to steal my sanity,
I often thought that I would not be strong enough to handle the process,
that I was for sure going to fall apart,
that self that I wanted no one to see,
But the moments came, and the labor built.
My body slowly let go of it’s need to control and prove itself and just accepted it’s GREATNESS.
My mind released it’s fear,
perhaps it was the rush of adrenaline,
perhaps it was the faith that God had my back.
Perhaps, I was actually as STRONG as I thought I was story I was trying to tell.
What I do know is that I ALWAYS made it through.
I ALWAYS did it naturally.
I ALWAYS did it in GRACE.
I ALWAYS pushed through (pun intended).
And at the day, I got to meet a beautiful new little human.
And more importantly, they had introduced me to my SOUL.
This new little human got me to meet myself at a new and more intimate place than before.
Experiencing this 7 time’s in my life I can tell you from experience and my heart that there is no difference between giving birth to a new little human being than there is to giving birth to your DREAMS.
I feel ALL the same fears, concerns, doubts and pains when I increase my coaching rates as I did when I gave birth.
I feel all the same things internally emotionally, when I step up to a new level of who I want to become and have to act on it.
I feel all the same things when I decide that I am NOT TURNING BACK from my mission, my calling, my purpose.
I feel all the same things when I COMMIT to doing more, BEING more, HAVING more.
I feel all the same things when I CLAIM MY LIFE as I did when I was Claiming the life of my new little human.
A long time ago a friend looked at me and said, ” Kendal, you are not afraid of anything, I wish I was more like you.”
I responded with, “What? I am afraid of everything, ALL the time.”
So often fear STOP’s us from our dreams.
Stop’s us from birthing the life that we were born to live.
Even though, I was always afraid.
and scared out of ever lovin’ mind,
I ALWAYS was COMMITTED to my SOUL.
I was always willing to step off that cliff and see where it my take me.
I was willing to fall so that I could learn how to get back up.
I was willing to look like a fool if it meant that I would grow.
I always understood that just living meant that we RISK.
And in that we were born to explore,
We were built to RISK.
And without that RISK, all we ever would be doing was to LIE TO OURSELVES and avoid our DREAMS.
Without discomfort, risk and fear.
We become NOTHING in a hurry.
We loose ourselves and our lives.
And thus we risk not just a ding to our ego,
Thank goodness for the little human’s that have guided me to feeling into this space and keeping it real with me every day.
Thank goodness that that I was willing to see the lesson,
I want to share this lesson with YOU.
Because whether you have a little human you brought into this world or not is sorta beside the point now.
The point is, that YOU were BORN for GREATNESS.
You were meant to have more.
You were meant to STAND OUT.
You were meant to RISK.
That is what every BREATH is trying to tell you.
So WAKE THE F*CK UP!
And Remember to Stop Existing & Start Living.
—Join Kendal TODAY for a F*ck Yes Life experience. Limited time access to 1:1 coaching and online coaching programs to help you master your FREEDOM based life NOW.