I most likely “should” not be doing this today, after all I am sick.
I am recovering from this nasty as f*ck cold that took over my voice, my chest, my head, my sinuses. Keeping me awake hours all night and just not letting me sleep like a hungry lover who never is fulfilled.
I most likely “should” just cancel my day and F-ck it!
I most likely “should” go to the doctor and get some med’s to help me bust through this shit quicker.
Yeppers.
That is what I most likely “SHOULD” do.
But that is NOT what leaders do.
That is not what high vibe peep’s do.
That is not what those of us who have dreams do.
No.
It sure is f*uck not.
I might be sick.
I certainly need to take some TLC time.
I most defiantly need rest and a few good nights sleep.
But incorporating a practice of “shoulding on myself?”
I am F-CK NO to that one.
That will not heal me quicker or help me reach my goals.
It will not bring my being to a higher VIBE.
It will dilute me.
It will suck me dry from the false judgement,
the ego,
the fear,
the resistance of being all of me.
It will prevent me from SHINING my Mother F-cking Light as strong as I WANT to.
The issue is NOT in the things that I say I “should” do or “should not” do.
The issue is the SHOULD.
The statement of should say’s that I am basing…
My life,
My health,
My beliefs,
My goals,
My style,
My attitude,
My sex,
My money,
My LIGHT
on what I BELIEVE the world thinks I should do or should not do/be/have.
It is not based on WHO I AM, but on who I think society will accept the most.
There is the issue.
You know this issue, don’t you?
I bet you know it intimately even.
Maybe to intimately to acknowledge even,
keeping this relationship with “SHOULD” in the hiding as much as you can.
Acting as though you are removed from it,
Like you divorced it.
You don’t have that issue any longer.
That was the old you.
The new you is…
ENLIGHTENED.
Right?
Hahahahahahahahah…..
Okay sure.
I will let you sit there with that.
And I will sit here with mine.
And we can just sit in silence of our hiding our truth for just a second longer.
But here is the issue in that….
I can ONLY sit here a second with it.
I simply don’t have the time to give my life to all the “SHOULD’S and SHOULD NOT’S”
I simply KNOW with CERTAINTY that they will NEVER provide me with anything that I want.
They will only steal my breath.
They will only take my dreams and bury them in the waste land of a life that COULD HAVE BEEN.
They will only fill my soul with REGRET.
No.
I sure as F-CK DO NOT have more than a second of my time to sit here with you, in the silence of not chasing my dreams.
I know with CERTAINTY that God has my back.
I know with CERTAINTY that anything I truly put my mind, heart and attention to will manifest like f-cking magick for me.
I know with CERTAINTY that you can have this too.
But FIRST.
First you have to let go of your shoulding nature.
First you have to say goodbye to it,
let yourself cry your tears of mourning of letting go of all that holds you back,
(she coughs)
Yes your hold backs, those things that feel so f-cking safe and comfortable.
I KNOW you don’t want to admit it.
I KNOW you want to cringe at the realization of it.
I KNOW that you find yourself holding your breath,
feeling guilt or shame even around it,
But it is F-CKING TRUE.
Isn’t it?
Imagine if you just FINALLY accepted that you were limitless.
Imagine if you just FINALLY decided to get selfish.
Imagine if you just FINALLY chose to say YES,
Yes to YOU.
Who would you be?
What would you have?
Where would you go?
What would you do?
Imagine if you just stopped shoulding on yourself.
What would it FEEL like with out the should in your life?
Seriously,
I am the one who is SICK AS F-CK here…
I am the one that “should” be crying in my yogurt about how crappy I feel,
How tired I am,
How shitty my body feels today,
How much I still have to do and have no energy for.
F-CK THAT!
You won’t catch me doing that.
Instead,
Instead you will see me leaning in to the discomfort of
SAYING YES….
YES, to the most important person in this Mother F-cking world.
YES to ME.
Saying YES
to self care,
telling myself that I am worthy,
that I am lovable,
that I am unf-cking stoppable,
that I am powerful,
beautiful,
magnetic
and healthy.
Sh*t Ain’t Going To Get Me Down.
I will step past that “Should Pile” and I will put on my shoes,
eat my yogurt and strawberries,
drink my coffee and water,
write out my commandments of manifestation,
BREATHE in Life.
And SHINE.
Now the ONLY Question of the day that remains,
Is what will you do with your “should pile?”
STOP Stepping in it!
That is what I highly recommend.
And As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
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