I CONTEMPLATE DEATH FREQUENTLY… AND THIS IS WHAT I HAVE LEARNED ABOUT LIFE, LOVE, PLEASURE AND JOY BECAUSE OF IT.

🧐☠️🤯I CONTEMPLATE DEATH FREQUENTLY… AND THIS IS WHAT I HAVE LEARNED ABOUT LIFE, LOVE, PLEASURE AND JOY BECAUSE OF IT. 🤯💀☠️
“Nothing is permanent.”
There are few things that we can be certain of in our life experience.
Those being:
👉Change.
👉Suffering.
👉Death.
And THAT is all you get!
That is what life offers you my love.
Anything else is for your molding.
It’s very zen of me to focus on death and suffering in truth.
Life is truly about suffering and how we choose to deal with it.
Suffering is not really a bad thing, I say that from my deepest heart space. Suffering brings with it the birth of desire. It creates in its wake the contrast needed for us to learn who we are and what we want to experience in life.
Life is a wild ride and God/universe is its reign holder.
But you my sweet are equally in charge of the way that your life moves. And you do so by accepting that the above three guarantees are just that – 👊GUARANTEES. 👊
From there you get to choose how you will live your life.
And the sad reality is that so many of us humans choose poorly. 😢
Now, don’t let this share today rain on your parade by any means.
It’s actually a share of sunshine, rainbows and unicorns farting glitter dust everywhere. 🤣🧚‍♀️🦄
I find myself contemplating death frequently when I look with depth into my relationship with my man.
Never before have I feared this space of transition, ending, death.
I have never walked into an intimate relationship thinking to myself, “Wow, I better really practice detachment here. This man holds me to a level of my soul that I have always dreamt of but never anticipated to manifest. I fear losing him.”
And that is the truth.
🥰”I FEAR LOSING THIS LOVE.”🥰
I do not fear him leaving me.
I do not fear my saying goodbye.
I do not fear the passing of our love into something that is no longer love, HOWEVER I do respect the reality that someday,
and in my book all too soon, because a thousand years is not long enough to wake in his arms, that we will have to say goodbye to the physical that we know so well and find comfort in.
Life has taught me much about suffering and loss.
From the loss of my parents, the loss of siblings and dear friends.
From the edge of the sword with my grandson and his heart transplant to the loss of financial security, business, health, safety and love.
👉Life has revealed its cruelty and beauty all in the same.
The blessings within the fear. 👈
And what I am certain of is that until we humans fear with respect death, change, and suffering for the blessing that it is we find ourselves never truly living.
We avoid living to our fullest and allowing ourselves to be ravished by life, because we fear these things I share here.
We stand aloof in our hearts and souls, armoured and protected at our gates worrying about a future that we are preventing by staying unattached from the greatest experiences life has to offer.
We run from these blessings by some psychotic idea that we can control life and its outcome.
Which is the same for every living thing on this planet.
Death. ☠️
And by doing so we armour ourselves and hide in our suffering instead of embracing it.
We avoid what we deem bad or evil.
Crap luck.
We drink ourselves into blindness.
We hide under the covers of drugs and medicines.
We harbour our hearts with dis-ease and scarcity.
And we point our fingers outward and blame.
Blame life for these evils and pain that we experience.
Ignoring what we are being blessed with altogether.
The beauty of the opportunity to live fully.
We are fearful that God/universe will come and steal it all away from us if we allow ourselves to be fully immersed into everything sacred, beautiful, yummy and good.
Yet this my love is the sacred romance from God/universe.
This is God courting us into the deepest levels of who we really are and our desires.
We deny our truth and desire for living unbound, fulfilled and in rapture by being irresponsible with the blessings that are bestowed upon us in the blessings of suffering, change and death.
We focus so much on losing, that we step away from our present blessings of love, joy, happiness, fulfillment to focus on what is inevitable.
All things transform. Nothing is permanent.
At first in my relationship with my partner, I avoided my heart.
I spoke non-truths and attempted to hide my heart and soul from him and myself so that I would not feel pain again. I knew at my core that he was what I had been waiting for. I knew that we were deeply bonded as though we had already been soul-merged for a millenia, and it scared me.
I trembled in fear of losing him before we ever became intimate.
I feared him turning away from me, from God snagging him out of my life long before we dated. Long before I admitted my heart to myself I feared the loss. And I did everything in my earthly power to armour against him, to hide myself from the love and connection.
I ran.
And then when we stepped down the path of couple-hood, I still tested the waters of arguing with my soul.
Hiding and not allowing myself the permission to breathe him in.
To feel this love.
Still some days, I wake in fear.
And I want to run because I do not want to experience the pain.
The emptiness.
I fear my heart being torn right out of my body.
At the thought of losing him.
And then I come back home to him and I.
I bring my attention into the present.
And I allow myself to fully be immersed into the NOW.
I stop the worry, the fear, the agonizing over what will certainly come in our distant goodbye of this physical AND instead I breathe into us here and now.
I share this with you today, because I see many people suffering without any end in sight.
I see so many couples agonizing over the things that they have no control over and the fact that they desire control over the natural cycles of life and love.
I see so many couples and singles alike ignoring the beauty of their lives.
The depth of their relationships and sex.
I witness so many dynamic souls hiding from living the abundance and glory that they were born to live and instead pursuing fear and pain.
🤯YOU WERE BORN TO BE RIPPED OPEN BY LIFE AND LOVE!
That is your sole purpose.
You are not to be tamed by life.
You are not to be safe in life.
You are not to be harboured up and feel nothing, detached from your heart and soul.
NO my love, you are here to feel.
To experience.
To transform.
And if you can understand this truth today,
you will meet me in the garden of death and appreciate your NOW.
Because that is all any of us ever have.
👉The NOW.👈
And you are missing it and all its rapture of love, joy, abundance and pleasure that it offers because you are looking so far into the future and fearing what will come for all of us.
☠My take on the lessons of contemplation of this subject is that I would rather die knowing that I have lost myself in the full immersion of loving completely (body, mind, heart and soul) than to continue to hide myself from it.
☠I would rather embrace life and all its wonders and joys by knowing that I have shared every breath of my soul experience in the way that feels most aligned at my core then to blame the world and life for the shortcomings that are not really such but instead opportunities to expand and grow.
☠In looking at life, I see that there really is nothing to fear but fear itself as the saying goes. God is a wild God, a creator of dramatic experiences that birth us into all that we are meant to become.
And if we are to gain every blessing we can in our lives then we must have faith and lean all the way into such beauty as intimate love and commitment of our souls with another that we know at a soul level like no other.
We must stop the insanity of getting caught up in our futures that are never coming and instead Awaken to our present.
Embrace joy, pleasure, love, abundance.
And dance in our shattering, our rapture, our birth.🦄🥰🥳
Because that is exactly what uniting at a soul level with another is.
Are you ready my love for this beauty?
Ask yourself today:
👉🥰👉”What aspect of your love story do you fear will be taken away by life if you give yourself permission to fully immerse into it and receive?”
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
Helping dynamite powerful souls like yourself discover love and fulfilment is what my passion is. Over the last two decades I have worked with hundreds of women & men such as yourself to call in their soulmate by aligning to their truth. I have guided countless couples not to just rekindle a love that they thought was lost, but to create an empowered turned on and fully aligned partnership based in love with 8 simple steps. If you are a woman or man who is looking for happiness, love and abundance in life and is sick and tired of just getting by, reach out to me for a FREE Clarity Call today where we will define exactly what is holding you back, what you are wanting to call in and the next best steps to achieve your desired life. Message me to set up your FREE Clarity Call today.

$1.4 MILLION AND YOU STILL DON’T VALUE IT!

A HEART COST $1.4 MILLION DOLLARS UNINSTALLED AND WITH ZERO ROOM AND BOARD.

 

And yet we don’t value them. We deny our hearts every f-cking day!And that is the sad truth.

 

Now you can say, well that heart that costs so much is because its primary function is to keep us alive and sometimes you need a new one to keep you going. Living is worth that much and more.

Yes living is worth that much and more. However, you are most likely not living. You are instead at best just getting by, surviving. And you are calling it living. Because while that heart of yours is beating you take it and this day for granted. Don’t you?

 

Let’s get serious.

 

You don’t even realize that you don’t value your heart. You think that it is serving its purpose just by beating and keeping the blood pumping through your veins.

 

But in truth…you are abusing it. You are not listening to it. You are actually denying it.You avoid it. You run from it. And you do it all in the name of “logic.”

 

Society and your upbringing hijacked your heart from you and you have bought it hook line and sinker ( big on the sinker part too) that you are to NOT LISTEN to your MF heart.

 

And then you wonder why sh*t don’t work out for you. Why you feel lost. Why you are never really happy. You may have fleeting moments of happiness, but you don’t really sink all the way into it do you. You may feel good here and there, but your “good days” require outside sources to act and do certain things. You don’t legitimately feel damn good.

 

Now you may tell a little lie here, I get it, you don’t want to actually surrender to the truth of your reality that you have allowed yourself to get a bit f-cked up through life. You want to feel like you are in control or perhaps that you are not in control, that life has caused all of this and you were not on board with it, but those are the cards that were dealt to you and you are doing the best you can with what you got.

 

The reality is that you are in control. You have allowed yourself to lose your heart. You may have not known that you were allowing it, you may have thought that it is just the way life is, you may have actually believed that if you listened to your heart that it would make you weak, lost or feeling stupid in someway. That it was not a good source of wisdom.

 

The opposite is true.

 

It is your GPS.

It is your path.

And it is far more valuable than $1.4 million.

It is worth EVERY F-CKING THING.

 

But you still don’t get it.

You still believe that it’s too dangerous to follow,

too uncertain to trust.

You still believe that it will get you into trouble and cause you pain and suffering,

because you “think” that those past painful events that you have lived through,

that some if not all of them were actually caused by your hearts poor judgment.

And so you deny it still.

And you have chosen to sit in agony for the rest of your days, avoiding life.

Turning away from bliss and joy, surrender to love and having all that you want for.

 

It’s sad.

Truly it is that so many choose this path of not discovering themselves.

 

And that is what the heart is all about.

Discovery of your truth.

It is your source of alignment to self,

to God.

 

It is through the soft words of our hearts and guidance that we can be led to everything.

 

It is said,

“The heart wants what the heart wants.”

 

And that is true.

It wants your joy.

 

But you must be willing to surrender to it.

To be unveiled and willing to drop your armour and feel.

It demands us to feel all of life,

the perceived good and bad.

 

Because it is through these things that we gain clarity and certainty in what our hearts crave.

 

Clarity.

Did you hear that?

Clarity, which is key to living a f-ck yes life,

key to having the love, the money, the well being that you speak of wanting.

You can strive for it through logic all your days,

and you can touch on it here and there,

but will never be able to maintain and keep it with joy without your heart.

You will find yourself struggling.

Fighting with others and self,

feeling lost and unseen,

while you fight to avoid what your heart already knows.

And this will be your ultimate suffering.

 

Not knowing the self.

Not living from alignment.

Not feeling life move through.

 

So what do you choose beautiful?

What will it be?

 

Continuing to live by other ideas, perceptions and judgement of who you are and what you should or should do or be?

 

Continue fearing the decisions that you make and what direction is best?

 

Continue wondering if you will ever be happy?

 

Or FINALLY surrendering to your divine GPS known as your heart.

Making it the most valuable tool that God has ever given you?

 

It’s time beautiful to acknowledge your truth, your power and your joy.

 

It’s time to say F-ck Yes! to your heart.

 

And As Always,

Stop Existing & Start Living

 

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

 

Want to make 2021 a year of living your truth?

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WHY DO WE AVOID OUR PLEASURE?

WHY DO WE AVOID OUR PLEASURE?

 

This is the question I sit here with,

pondering how could I have ever been so silly as to avoid everything that felt good,

to quickly turn away from positive direction,

out of fear.

 

Fear of anything,

fear of fucking it all up,

of not being good enough,

or maybe fear of being too much,

fear that I was not worthy of whatever it may be,

and so I turned away.

 

And used all my logic to make it happen and look appropriately.

I spent years doing this.

I still catch myself doing all too much in my opinion.

 

But I think that perhaps our biggest fear is the fear of not trusting ourselves.  We have made some poor decisions in the past, so how can we trust self here?

 

This is the one that can get us all.

 

And so we often psych ourselves out from following the lead of “feel good” and we turn around out of fear that we cannot trust ourselves.  That we should shut down and ignore, move away from whatever it is that we are wanting.

 

You see though,

we cannot just lay something down like a feeling or a desire in one area of our lives, or around the energy of one subject area of life and not expect the energy to seep out to all areas.

 

All of life is interwoven.

 

If we shut our passion down,

we start to lose passion in all areas of life.

If we shut down playfulness in one area of life,

we lose the fun in all areas of life.

We prevent ourselves from feeling all the emotions of life,

then inevitably we lose feeling for all areas of life,

and we drown in our fear of feeling.

 

But we humans,

we love to take things away from ourselves so that we can prove that we are good people, that we are trustworthy, loyal, committed,  safe…. etc. 

 

Don’t we?

and we start the whole proving ourselves by doing the take away from self typically for the sake of love.

 

Our version of love is really great at stealing so much beauty in life.

We believe that we must not be so many things when in love,

all the things that were okay when single suddenly cannot be experienced or it be looked upon as though we have commitment issues.  So no opposite sex friends ( we don’t care how long you have known them, you are in love now, you never need to speak to the opposite sex again, your love is your everything), do not be overly kind or smile, look into the eyes of the opposite sex again, do not take kindness from the opposite sex, always say no to help from anyone that is not the same sex as you unless they are your love.

 

We turn away from all the emotions,

the turn on, the play, the openness, the conversations even that add wisdom and creative thought into our lives.

 

We turn it away to “show” or should I say PROVE our love.

All of these things bring pleasure into our lives though.

We are shutting down and turning away from our pleasure,

in belief that by shutting it all down we will gain more pleasure because we now have this ….

 

THIS RELATIONSHIP.

 

And this relationship will fulfill our everything and we “should” not need for anything outside of this relationship.

 

After all that is what love gives us.

EVERYTHING.

 

Right?

But nothing is farther from the truth.

We are still human.

We still need connections from many.

We still have much learning to do and that requires a relationship with others outside of THIS RELATIONSHIP that is to be our everything.

 

But we shut it down.

We shut it down hard too.

We make sure not to notice,

not to connect,

but instead to guard and hide.

We shame and guilt ourselves should we even catch the eye of someone smiling our direction, blaming ourselves for the look on our face, the laughter we were showing or the garments on our body.

 

And so we shame our energy.

We shame our magnetism.

We shame our joy.

We shame our turn on for life,

and the saddest truth of all is that all this shaming has us shaming our love.

Because love is not about judgement and control.

Love is not about hiding and condemning.

Love is not about sacrificing our friendships and desires.

Love is about being lifted up by another who wants the best for us and wants our joy,

wants our light to shine bright.

Not dim it.

 

Love wants us to enjoy life and reap the pleasures of this life.

Love wants us to bask in it and show it to the world.

 

Ego,

which is where most of us reside when supposedly “in love”

wants to control, judge, condemn, feel jealousy and insecurity.

Ego wants you to hide who you are and change to fit the ideas and insecurities of others needs.

Ego fears all other relationships.

Ego fears your joy and your light.

Ego does not see how it turns you off and shuts you down over time in the name of love.

It believes that it is saving you,

saving your relationship,

saving your love.

Ego does not have faith.

It does not trust.

And it is quick to find fault anywhere but with itself.

 

Ego has us turn away from EVERYTHING that is pleasure and good for us,

but it has us run into the arms of all the pleasure that condemns us.

Ego will have us act in rage.

Ego will carry us the bottle to drink our sorrows away in.

Ego will have us “I’ll show you” as we sex with people we do not want to, to prove yet another point.

Ego will have us mask our feelings and hide with drugs and food.

Ego will get us to retract from life, to become workaholics.

Ego will do its job for sure…

the job it feels it must and that is to KEEP YOU SAFE AT ALL COST.

And it will do so under the guise of love everytime.

It will make you question yourself and your love.

 

And here is where we lose our power.

Here is where we lose ourselves.

Here is where we step out of alignment with SOUL, with God.

 

Because SOUL and God do not feel the same way about any of this that you are feeling through your ego.

 

The fact that you are having negative feelings, fear or insecurity, judgement and jealousy, a desire to control shows just how out of alignment you are.  You could not feel this much pain if your inner self did not feel differently.

 

That is what being out of alignment means.

When you feel drastically different from  that that your inner being feels.

 

And do you honestly believe in your heart of hearts that TRUE LOVE ever desires for you to not shine?

For you to deny yourself joy, happiness, connection?

 

Do you believe that true love wants to control you?

 

Yet you sit there turning away from your joy,

your happiness and your expansion,

andall the pleasure that these things bring you,

based on the concept that you need to prove your love by doing just this.

 

I get it.

I too am guilty of this ego game.

I have shunned my truth in the face of what I thought to be love.

I have hidden myself from my truth based on fear and judgement.

I have said no to myself when I was a fuck yes because I was afriad of not being good enough or making a mistake.

I have been there.

I have made poor choices based on this ego.

I have avoided my intuition out of fear of not being able to trust myself.

 

And I have suffered the results.

 

The regret of not saying yes to living,

to growing and expanding self,

to experience,

to love and connection.

To abundance and joy.

 

Regret.

It’s a nasty bi-product of saying no to the alignment of self.

 

The ego is a bitch my dear.

We all have one.

Our power is reestablished by witnessing our emotions and seeing for the guidance system that they are.

 

Are you ready to learn your truth?

To live the life that you feel called too and love fully?

 

Authentically.

 

As Always,

Stop Existing & Start Living

Coaching for Grown A*s Believers

 

October Asskickery Month is almost upon us.

Are you wanting to make some changes in your life, love or sex?

Want to take action but do not know where to start?

Need a swift kick to get what you want?

Reach out to me about this global opportunity to have that F-ck Yes Life that you are wanting for now.

 

 

Enter Sensual Surrender For Your Magical Expereince.

I WAS FLOATING IN A SEA OF SENSATION.
 
There I was,
our flesh touching.
The water lapping around my breasts and shoulders.
I was breathing the moment and all the feeling of floating into my being.
Taking it in,
devouring it.
feeling as though the universe was asking for me to open even more and allow the deep penetration of my soul to occur.
 
There he was,
resting next to me, his hand on my thigh.
I could feel his breathing as it caused ripples in the water.
His body was smooth and his desire was present.
 
There he was,
on my other side,
breathing in the wind.
His arm touching mine,
soft and smooth.
 
And the water washed over all of us.
The wind in the trees before us was dancing and asking for our surrender.
 
My desire was to touch,
to exchange breath,
to become entwined.
 
I wanted to allow myself to be seen and felt with both of them,
I wanted to feel thier hands caressing me.
I wanted to touch and let my love be felt through the sensaul stroking and playing of our skins enveloping each other.
 
I wanted to feel.
Feel past this phyiscal state of being.
Feel through the emotions,
the fears and the concern.
I wanted to penetrate life by embodying this moment fully and dropping deeper into surrender.
 
 
My hunger was present,
a ravonous beast rumbling within my groin,
within my heart my soul rattled in the cage it felt placed about it.
I breathed.
Breathed into this container known as my physical body and asked my chest to relax,
I asked my soul what it was desiring to achieve from such a state of vulnerability and desire?
 
And my heart leaped,
it called out to the winds,
it wanted to dance naked in the moon light,
it wanted to swing in the hammuc and howl at the moon.
It wanted to be taken.
Taken into the galaxies and be blasted from every startling.
It wanted to be shed of its chains,
its fears and its silly conditions.
It wanted to defy society and relationship labeling.
It wanted to love.
 
It wanted to love fully and authentically.
and it wanted to tap back into that space,
that yummy space that it had known once before and SURRENDER to the call of this wild woman that wanted to open her wings.
Her legs.
Her heart.
Her vessel.
 
My soul knew as it knows today in this moment the power that can transend from moments of bliss,
moments of utter transendence.
It knows that when you can come together with another,
when you can drop into truth without fear or need to control,
when you can access love,
that you hold all the power.
 
That here in this space you are the key master.
And all one ever needs to do is choose a door.
 
This space I speak of is not found in sex.
It is not found in meditation nor prayer.
It is not found in work or what we might refer to as purpose.
It is not found in any relationship or nutritional plan.
It is not found in text books or doctrin.
 
This place I speak of is ONLY discovered through the greatness of your ability to soften and let the universe take you.
In the sensualness that moves through you at times like this,
no matter what the act that you might be performing,
you are moving with the magical essence and flow of the divine.
 
Here from this state of embodiment you are using all your senses.
You are not trapped prisioner to your thoughts,
not holding your emotions out of fear,
you are not touching or acting from a state of control or even desire,
you are just being.
Fully.
 
This is the expanded expression of the human expereince.
This is what we are meant to explore.
 
But we bunker down,
we armour up,
we hide and we fear.
 
In our hiding and fearing we feel loss and suffering.
We gain the illionary belief that we own one another and that we are to remain small.
We buy into the concepts of not enough and control.
ANd we search for purpose,
he hunt for joy and connection,
and we do it all with limited connection to self.
We come into our life moments with with zero to no understanding of self and we lay blame to all those we dance with for the way that we feel.
 
We hide our hearts out of fear of getting hurt,
we shut down our voices and our expressions as to not damage anyone else.
We lift up th eheavy shileds in hope that we can prevent future wounding….
 
And we feel EMPTY.
We feel lost.
Undesired,
disconnected.
And we question why?
Why can I never be happy?
Why do I always end up right back here?
 
It is the shield.
That armour that you carry.
The weight of fear and judgement.
The sword of control.
Those are what keeps you from receiving all that you want for.
Those are the demons that you bare.
 
Soft and subtle.
Fluid and entwined.
The sensaulness of a soul surrendered,
a heart opened and body unburrdened.
 
Here is your bliss.
Here is your power.
Here is the naked truth.
 
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
Join me for Tantric Sex Magick LIVE workshop in Plano Texas where you will learn the secrets to manifesting through the power of your sex.
Not local?
Can’t make the class?
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It’s Your Stinking Thinking Luv!

STOP YOUR DAMN STINKING THINKING LUV.

You know what I mean

You are sitting around wanting.
Craving all those things.
Desiring a life you don’t currently have,
And thinking the way to achieve it is by focusing on the not having of it.

Thats such stinking thinking luv.
Its polluting up your mind and your feelings about everything that you have.

If you really want the life you currently don’t have then realize that the only fucking way to get what you want is to apply your focus to that, that you WANT.
And the FEELING of it.

But NO EFFING way will you do that, huh.
No thats not logical.
You have this problem.
This challenge before you.
You must FIX what is broken
You must PROVE you are worthy.

It can’t be that easy to just start feeling good.
Right now.
Right here.
In this very moment,
To make up your damn mind to LOVE your MOFO life just as it is and feel BLESSED.

No way can it be so simple to change your life by applying your focus to being how you want right now instead of looking somewhere else,
Someplace outside of who you are and what you have.
No your stinking thinking has you believing that your happiness,
Is something you must search for.
Something you must look outside yourself for.
Something that you must work for or show your worth for.

Your stinking thinking has you focused on giving up your power to this world outside yourself in hopes that by doing so you will achieve this elusive thing called HAPPINESS.

And the sad and funny truth is that happiness is not found in things or other people.
Its found in your heart luv.
Its found by you truly embodying YOU.
But you were never taught that.
You were never shown its safe to be you.
To feel you.
To show,
Express you.

Instead the lies and illusions of looking elsewhere were given to you and now the void within is so vast you feel lost.
Listless.
Empty.
You have the relationship,
The house and snazzy car.
You have the education.
The kids.
The dog.
The success and even money in the bank.
You have seen this world.
And you still FEEL empty as fuck!
You still feel lost in who you really are and it all just seems pointless at best most days.

Oh luv,
You are so beautiful in your misgivings of this thing called life.
You are so simple in you desire for happiness and fullness.
But its your MOFO stinking thinking thats making it all so complicated.
So disheartening and making you miss the richness you already possess.

Yes luv.
You are RICH.
YOU are ABUNDANT.
And happiness is within you.

Will you CHOOSE to see and feel it or will you continue to give your power and joy away to the illusions and grandeur of this world that tells you to focus on the problems,
The pain.
The lack.

Whats your decision luv?

And as always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
” Coaching for Grown A*s Believers ”

Just Another Day in Paradise… Or Is It? Not for all OBVIOUSLY. ( Is This YOU?)

Just another day in paradise.
Just another day living,
breathing.
Nothing happening here.
Or is there?
 
I think there is luv.
I think there is so much happening here.
 
And what is happening here is something that I know you long for.
I know that if you knew how to achieve it,
how to have more of it,
how to keep it,
YOU WOULD.
 
or would you luv?
 
Because maybe you would not.
Maybe you would say,
“yeah, yeah… that’s nice for her, but…..”
 
Maybe you just don’t think you can have it.
Maybe you believe that it is something you only capture small moments of in this life.
Maybe you think it requires ton’s of money.
Or sex.
or something else outside of yourself.
 
I don’t know.
But I wonder if I told you the God’s honest truth about it,
and I shared the secrets to obtain it,
would you go after it?
 
Or would you shrug your shoulders,
frown and carry on as is?
 
Here I am in paradise.
Here I am with an amazing man.
This resort we are staying is so beautiful,
the people are sweet and personable,
I have nothing to complain about except that I would like to say a few days longer than planned originally.
But that is always the case when you are enjoying a new destination and escaping all that troubles you, right?
 
Laughing and playing is easier here.
Lounging and letting go is simpler.
Smiling and being care free comes more naturally.
Connecting and just being present just is.
And is beautiful.
 
Or at least it should be.
But so many people I watch from a far,
and they frown,
they walk slumped and humped over,
they look bored,
stressed,
anxiety ridden still.
or even just dead.
They are not laughing and enjoying.
They are not connecting and letting go.
They do not look happy.
 
How can this be?
 
It just is because these folks who refuse to let the joy in here,
here in paradise,
have no idea how to open up to joy in any way.
They are so accustom to pain and suffering that even when attempting to enjoy life they still manage to not.
 
And then there is the crowd who is drinking themselves into laughter and letting go.
The one’s who are still running from their pain even here.
Who cannot let go of the stress,
they live in their minds,
in their fear,
and they drink to mask their worry.
They bake themselves mentally and physically,
they eat all the food they can,
to make sure they get their full dollars worth.
In scarcity they live and remain.
Even here in paradise.
 
This luv is not healthy.
This is not THRIVING.
This is far from living at all.
And it does not encompass joy.
 
I share with you this because today,
today my lover asked me while sitting on the beach watching the waves roll in,
he asked me if there was anything that I wanted to change in my life?
 
He said, ” I know you have goals on your income and stress level, your time and what you want to create, but outside of that do you want to change anything?”
 
My answer:
 
NO!
 
I love my life just as it is.
I love my life even if my goals are not met with my business, finances, time or physical body.
I am HAPPY just as I am and if I remain in these very shoes the next decade I am happy.
 
I want for so much and I am building with great intent and focus just for those dreams and desires.
Each day I feel my life moving the direction that I want.
Steady and strong.
I do not fear tomorrow.
I appreciate yesterday.
I adore today.
 
And no matter what,
TODAY I AM HAPPY.
 
Today my heart is full of joy.
Today my heart is in gratitude.
The new people that walk into my life,
the experiences,
the love,
the connection.
The opportunity.
Each and every day is a new day.
It is a new opportunity to have it all.
and all of it is not somewhere out there,
out there where I don’t have it…
 
No.
It is not out there at all.
It is RIGHT HERE.
In my mind,
in my heart,
it is soul lead.
And it is felt.
 
My eye’s radiate with this joy.
My face beams with it as well.
My calmness,
my flow.
It is all because,
I have committed to it.
But luv,
the answer to having it is not some riddle or maze through all of time and space,
it is not found buy the purchase of something great,
or by the search even of the very thing that it is.
 
No luv,
to have this JOY.
To have this HAPPINESS.
 
All you ever need to is commit.
It is here.
Here within you right now.
You must learn to feel it.
You must learn to love yourself.
To trust in this life,
in God and your SOUL.
 
Here you will discover all that you wish.
But you must commit.
 
COMMIT TO YOU.
To JOY.
 
Will you commit?
Let’s Go.
 
And As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
Ask me about 1:1 coaching to achieve you happiness and goals today.
Joy is waiting for YOU.
Message me for deet’s on getting the support you need to achieve it.

Your Goofy is Your Superpower to Success!

I feel goofy!
I feel silly!
I feel like a BIG effing kid.
And that is what makes me,
ME.

Often my grammer sucks.
My spelling even worse.
I put exclamation points where they don’t go.

I LOVE comma’s! 😻
I am learning this whole emoji thing,
I hear it is a language in itself.
One I aim to learn,
but find myself a bit confused with. 🤨

I make up words on the spot,
can flip into weird accents without notice.
My mood switches more than the winds of Santa Anna.
I am up,
I am down.
I am complex,
and extremely surfacy.

I truly don’t give a F-ck what you think of me,
if I please you or not,
but goodness how I dislike confrontation and want nothing more than you to be happy with me.

I am pretty F-cked UP!
I got a whole universe of baggage.
My ego loves to dance on my SOUL.
I self- sabotage at any opportunity I give myself,
and I get caught in worry and overwhelm when it happens.

But that is what makes me,
ME.

I am a city girl.
I am a country girl.
A hick and a slut.
I am a saint and a teacher.
A mother and a cunt.

I am most certainly not everyone’s peach.
Many dislike my ways and looks.
But for each and every one of them,
there is a SOUL MATE that supports,
this crazy dance.

I see through the bullsh*t.
Your’s and mine a like.
I will be sarcastic, obnoxious,
bold and raw,
but bring peace to your heart,
as you will not feel judgement,
but love instead.

Did I mention I am goofy?
Well indeed I am.
It may be my BIGGEST or BOLDEST characteristic once you get to know me,
it stands right behind this EGO I have.
Which tries it’s damnedest to not let my light be seen,
my play be felt, and this BIG kid in me that is always wanting to enjoy.
Be SEEN.

I want to get it perfect.
This I most certainly do.
But I understand that perfection does not exist the way we think of it,
but instead its about FEELING.

We are all projects,
in this thing called life.
You and I alike.
It’s our purpose ,
our mission to support one another.
The best way to achieve this,
is not through criticism and or being right.
It’s through tapping into your GOOFY,
letting the KID come out and PLAY.

But you gotta love yourself enough,
be courageous and weird,
stand out from all the sheeple’s who flock in fear.
It’s not there that you will find me,
no I am over here.
In the land of goofy, strange and imperfect.
The land of acceptance.
It may be a bit confrontational to stand out in the crowd.
It may feel like a lifetime adrenaline rush,
not a walk in the clouds.
But I can tell you my fellow Goof.
Its what we are to do.
To tap the F-ck INTO,
and BE WHO WE ARE.

Not hide from our purpose.
Not run from the feelings.
Not bury our heads in the sand,
but look out and say,
“Here I AM!”

It’s your God given right,
you are worthy in deed you are,
to have all the abundance,
the house and the car,
your bank account over flowing,
your life abundant and rich.
Yes it is your God given right,
to be a BIG RICH KID.

Let that goofy out I tell you,
let it be felt and be seen.
It’s your ticket to greatness,
to not be so serious,
to not worry,
to not fear.
God has your back,
its always been that way.

Acceptance, love and silliness.
Your own version will get you on your way,
no one else really matters,
if you are not STRONG.

Realize the injustice you are doing,
to this world and the ones you love,
the dishonor you are showing,
when you shrink and hide who you are.

So be that BIG kid.
Be that GOOF that you are.
Let your LIGHT SHINE bright.
And Be Who Are.

And remember,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

kendalwilliams.com

That Child Like Enthusiasm Is Key.

Enthusiasm.
Goose bumps of knowing you are doing it.
The thrill.

The JOY. 
Want to know when you are in alignment to receiving all you desire?
These are the things to look for.
These are the characteristics of allowing a miracle to flow into your life.

We all have fear.
We all doubt.
We are all uncertain of our worthiness.
And we want to figure out the 1-2-3’s to guarantee our success.

But much like when we first learn how to ride a bicycle we can get it all right.
Put our feet on the pettles.
Balance our butt on the seat.
Make sure the path we are riding on is flat, straight and without to many obstacles.
We can even ask and get help to support us.

But inorder to really take off and ride.
Free.
By ourselves.
We have to risk falling.
We have feel the adrenaline of not having the support.
We have to let go of our need for attachment of safety.

This is the freedom.
The faith.
That is required.
And with it.
The enthusiasm.
The goose bumps.
The JOY.
Of allowing it to happen.

Make a miracle happen today!
Allow yourself to feel life move through you.
Allow your heart to race.
Your emotion to be felt.
Allow yourself to be happy instead of so serious.
Allow yourself to play.
Allow yourself to expand.

If you fear the risk of falling,
Realize this….
You thus fear the risk of succeeding.

Everything has two sides.
Put your attention on what you want to have happen.
Allow the feeling of having your desire.
Feel it.
Be EXCITED.
Be in JOY.

AND THRIVE.

As Always
Stop Existing & Start Living
Coaching for Grown A*s Believers

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To claim the life that you know you were born to live?
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Reasons or Results – Which Is Your Life About?

Just this morning I was walking my kindergartner into his school. There I was in yoga pants, a tank top and sweat shirt off one shoulder. My hawaii flip flops on my feet and my hair tossed up in a pony tail. My son and I were goofing around like we do every morning, laughing and hugging, picking on each other as we crossed the parking lot and walked down the entry way of the school.

It was just another morning in truth.
And yet it was not.
Because this morning I was people watching more so than what I normally do for some reason.
And as always with people watching I always feel so separated from those around me.
I feel judgmental.
Almost critical.
And maybe I should be ashamed to admit that here publicly, but living by my true style I am going to stand in my raw truth with you and just speak it.
I mean we are all judgmental and critical.
And anyone who claims to not be is hiding or lying.

What it comes down to in my opinion, is what you choose to do with the judgments and thoughts that come up.
Do you choose to observe them,
do some good inquiry around them,
and discover deeper messages about yourself?
Or do you choose to pick apart others and find fault and reason as to why you are suffering or how you are better than another in order to justify your worth or reasons?

So here I was,
walking in the school with my son like fifty other women,
and what I noticed was the lack of connection between these parents and their children. There was no laughter, only seriousness and rushing.
There were no smiles even, just pissed off turned down expressions.
Most walked quickly and with a hunched over frame, as though they were trying to hide.
And then there were a few who bee-bopped by looking like they had been up for 3 hours already. Very well put together, but walking in haste.
Entering the school,
music playing, teachers singing and welcoming children, I noticed how the kids lit up as they entered the school because the teachers were appearing excited and happy to start the day with them. The upbeat music caught your ear and made you want to sing along, which is what I do every morning.

But I was alone.
and parents looked at me,
casting their own judgement back.
Most likely wondering who this crazy woman is who dares be happy and sing out loud to her child and shake her hips at the front door as she kisses her kid good by and gives a big hug, then turns and chats with a teacher or two?

Yes, so there I was judging and being judged.
And as I turned and walked back to my car, I noticed how so many parents just seemed lifeless.
Now I was feeling pity.
And I don’t do pity very well.
My pity quickly turned to irritation and disgust.
I looked at these people,
and in my belief they each have a purpose.
They each have a talent.
They are each born for greatness.
They are worthy.
But all I see here is a lack of worth.
And the only effing reason for it is that they are allowing it.
And what are they teaching their children by accepting such a life of low vibe, low energy, dullness and disconnect?

They are teaching them to be the same.
Because our children 90 % of the time do not learn from what we tell them to do, but from what we show them we are doing.

You want an honest child.
Be honest with your child and others.

You want a compassionate child.
Be compassionate with your child and others.

You want a child that can stand on their own two feel and is not easily lead astray.
Then be strong in who you are and have good boundaries and speak your truth.

Whatever you are desiring your child to grow up to be,
realize that you are an example to them.

So back to my point.

Here as I walked I saw a bunch of people who had somewhere along the life trail gotten good with just existing.
Gotten good with their reasons,
their excuses and why’s.
They had settled into not having.
Settled into average.

And had forgotten that they could define what their average looked and felt like.

It’s crazy to think how close to all that we want each and everyone of us truly is.
And yet it is so.
It is no further away then what we are willing to accept for ourselves.
Willing to believe for ourselves.
Willing to expect for ourselves.

But WE have to actually want it bad enough to stop calling in all the reasons that we don’t have it or cannot have it.

Our reasons have got to mean less to us then our DESIRE.

So what are you settling for?
What are the core beliefs that you have that are creating things that you don’t want?
And are you conscious to them?

Let’s get real.
Let’s get raw.
Let’s define.

And As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

Sick and tired of settling for so much less than what you know you can have?
Accepting less in your success, your finances, your love, your relationships or your health?

Well STOP making excuses and TAKE the CALL TO ACTION TODAY.

Kendal I was bankrupt when I first met you. I had no idea how I was going to pay you. Working a dead end job, going through a nasty divorce and had lost everything. All I knew was that if I did not have faith right now and stand my ground that life was going to run me over. Thank God I chose this! Your coaching did not just help get me through everything, it transformed my existence. Today I am making three times the income I was back then. I am dating a dynamic woman and cannot imagine life much better. It is all because of your guidance and wisdom. I wish more people understood the true power of a mentor. Thank beautiful! – Timothy Gearst, Dallas Texas

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Could This Be You?

What Makes You Giggle? Do Share. It Is Vital to Your F-ck Yes! Life

[jwplayer mediaid=”9421″]

To live with a child like soul. 
What does that statement mean to you?

To me….
It means to allow the silly in.
To not be fearful of play.
To embrace your day with enthusiasm and joy.
To get loud.
And passionate.
Let yourself be seen.
And LAUGH.

And most importantly to JUST BE YOU.
You know when a child starts to grow up and loose their life? Its when they get serious about who they are to be instead of who their soul proclaims,
When they start to worry about grades more than happiness and connection,
When they question not what makes them smile but how they are perceived,
When they avoid getting dirty instead jumping in the puddles.

This is when a child starts their transformation into the land of zombie adulthood.

I don’t believe this has to be true.
Back in the day….
Like when I was 25 and taking life so serious.
As a mom of 3 youngster’s back then,
I thought that being a good mom meant that I could not be me.
I thought i had to act,
Dress,
Speak,
Cook,
Etc. Etc.

A certain way.
Because the true me was not good enough.
Wise enough.
Stable enough.
Or anything else.

I thought I had to be more.
Someone I was not.
And I drove myself batty trying to achieve this version of someone that was not real.
A d so far from my soul.

But I looked like I had it all together.
LOL

Fast forward 18 years…
Now a 43 year old mom of 7 babies.
Soon to be grandmom or mimi as I am goin’ with,
And I am still serious.

Serious about BEING ME!
And that means there is no version of me,
Other than just who I am in any moment.
How I choose to show up in my life,
To live,
To raise my children,
Has NOTHING to do with anyone elses opinions or ideas.
It has everything to do,
With FEELING GOOD.

And what feels good?
To live outloud.
Passionate.
Playful.
Silly.
Enthusiastic.
Turned On.
And I now laugh.
At everything.
Especially me.
And my kids.
Like this little munchkin in this video.

Folks.
Its so effing powerful to tap into that inner child.
That inner child dreams.
Believes in magic.
Loves life.
And themselves.
And is fearless being themselves.

All the things needed to be a bada*s in life and THRIVE.

So tell me love…
Share in the comments here.
What makes you giggle?

As always, 
Stop Existing & Start Living
Coaching for Grown A*s Believers.

Let’s talk about accessing your SOUL.
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