Yesterday I shared a fact that I knew when I shared it would upset the apple cart for many people, but that’s what truth and reality often does…
Awareness, growth, transformation never come without an upset.
If everyone was living in peace and remained quiet and subordinate, never questioning things but just going along with the flow of society and culture than we would never see any upsets, we would just keep chugging along and being the good folk that some desire us to be, never knowing ourselves, never touching our greatness and never transforming lives.
But we humans at our core want for more in everything.
The majority of us want for good, want for kindness and love, authenticity and support. However, we have never been taught what these things mean, in truth we have been taught the reverse meaning for each of these things as though it is the thing.
In the intricate tapestry of life, we are often entangled in threads of expectation, attachment, and the fear of disappointing those around us. This intricate dance mirrors the complexity of our humanity.
Right now, let’s delve into a profound truth: the transformative journey of embracing authenticity.
Imagine a garden you’ve lovingly nurtured, where you’ve tended to each plant with care. As much as you may wish to keep this garden blooming, you must allow it to flourish in its own unique way.
Similarly, we are not meant to be captives of our fears or slaves to the expectations of others. Our existence is a priceless gift, a voyage to explore the vast landscapes of our souls.
True kindness should never confine us; it should be the wind beneath our wings, propelling us towards our most genuine selves.
Often, kindness is misunderstood as an obligation to bear the emotional burdens of others. We hesitate to express our boundaries, to speak our truths, or to gently say ‘no’ for fear of causing discomfort. Yet, always remember this: you are not responsible for the emotions of others. You are solely accountable for your intentions and actions.
As we seek inner harmony, we must be true to ourselves and those who walk beside us. This truth may unsettle at times. It can stir ripples of unease and uncertainty, both within ourselves and in our relationships. But it is also the catalyst for growth and transformation.
Releasing the need to constantly please others is an act of profound self-love.
By prioritizing our well-being, we become better equipped to offer genuine help and support to those who share our journey. It’s like nurturing that garden I started this off with; we must tend to ourselves before we can provide sustenance to others.
Each day, muster the courage to stand up for yourself, to address disrespect, and to set healthy boundaries. This isn’t unkindness; it’s a celebration of self-respect and self-preservation. It’s the recognition of our inherent worth on this incredible odyssey called life.
The voyage of letting go is not without moments of doubt and trepidation. Guilt and shame may wash over us, as if we’re betraying the roles we’ve long upheld. Yet, in reality, we’re liberating ourselves from the constraints of expectations. In doing so, we embrace our most authentic selves.
Here lies a profound truth: When we embrace our true selves, set healthy boundaries, and seek authentic relationships, we often find ourselves walking a path with fewer companions. Many in our lives may have been there for what we could give them, not for who we truly are. These misaligned connections may naturally drift away when we start to genuinely love ourselves.
Which brings me back to my post from yesterday that upset the apple cart: “What if I told you that the majority of your relationships including family, friends, work and other; were not real but in fact based in manipulation, fear and guilt?”
Many people felt strong emotions around this statement and questioned my reasoning for even posting it.
Yet reality is not shifted because we have chosen to have upset feelings and frustrations with something that we have read, with the viewpoints of another. No reality still remains.
I can share from a very real-world experience of my own in working with countless thousands of individuals through two decades that many people discover what I have shared here to be their truth in the majority of their relationships — even with family and close friends. Just yesterday I spoke with two people that shared that their best friend and sister dropped them like a hot potato when they shared a boundary. One was ghosted suddenly after years of closely knowing this other and the other was told that she was being unkind in asking for what she needed which was a respectful boundary…
We talk a ton about triggers, gaslighting and all the narcissism in our world right now, but coming up close and personal with the reality that its present in our dearest relationships and should we choose to say no, that we will most likely lose this person that we love is a painful thought.
So, we are faced with the choice to love ourselves and let everyone else be and do as they will, knowing that we are not responsible for them but that we may lose them by stepping on a healthier path for ourselves and tending to our own garden, or we continue with the charade and continue wondering why we are not being seen, heard, felt, understood, cherished and committed too.
We are all artists, sculpting the masterpiece of our lives with every choice we make. Embracing authenticity and setting boundaries is an art form, one that requires practice, patience, and a profound connection with our inner selves. Within this art, we discover the beauty of liberation, the serenity of authenticity, and the omnipotence of real love.
I urge you to embark on this odyssey of self-discovery with an open heart. Embrace the art of letting go of what does not serve your greatest life and good and nurturing genuine connections. In doing so, you will uncover the extraordinary within yourself and walk a path illuminated by the brilliance of authenticity.
Love to hear your thoughts on this in the comments below — DROP ’EM NOW and hit share if this resonated with you in any way.
As always,
loving you from here,
Stop Existing & Start Living.