👍GREAT JOB BEING PRESENT IN THIS SO CALLED RELATIONSHIP, BUT YOUR PRESENCE IS EFFING IT ALL UP…👊🤯👊
I am sick and tired of hearing about all that matters is your presence in the MF moment.
Over and over again, I hear beautiful, soulful, intelligent women talking about all they want is a present, conscious man who gets it.
They speak about how they want this and that. They know that over the course of time they will figure out if he is really committed to them and emotionally available because it will become clear. And they are somehow strangely okay with the reality that they are going to do what we humans do so well…
invest time without reason and get attached.
They anticipate that this relationship much like the last one will more than likely cause them pain and suffering, but it is part of the process.
So they just have to bear with it and keep chugging along in hopes that this might be different.
After all, if there is love there, they will know it and that love will hold it all together.
Love conquers all. 🥰
Well my beautiful, soulful, intelligent woman looking for her soulmate, you could not be further from the truth.
😳Love does not conquer all. 🤯
Love like you are viewing it, is not even love.
But love in general cannot conquer incompatibility.
We ladies get caught up in the fantasy world that love is some magical formula that heals everything and makes it all work out someway. But that is truly just a fantasy.
And when we women accept or even walk into dating and courting with the idea that we “just need to be present in the moment and it will all work out” we are leaving ourselves wide open for pain and suffering as well as letting ourselves off the hook for what is really needed if we want to develop a soulmate relationship based in authentic love and connection.
And that is commitment.
Today’s dating world is lacking commitment and I am not speaking about commitment to the person. 🤔🤔🤔
I am talking about being committed to the vetting process that dating is.
Why are you dating?
Most people, male and female alike, are dating in hopes to find love. To find that “one” person that they want to do life with on all levels till the end of their days.
Yet they date with no commitment to the process of exploring a relationship with this other person let alone entering into a life long partnership with them.
And that is why so much casual dating is happening for ALL age brackets these days.
👉👉Neither side wants to commit to the process. 👈👈
Ain’t that the sad truth!!!
Instead they hope that this “vibe” , this “feeling” , this “mood” that they have is a sign of love.
They call lust, energetic connection.
They get caught up in limerence, infatuated with someone and they think that this is some amazing connection that they are experiencing and so they jump into the deep end of relationship with this other person, hungry for what they have been wanting for.
Companionship, connection & sex.
Only to find out that this other person was not as far into the pool as they were and might even be a bit crazy, a train wreck, not truthful or just using them for the situation at hand.
You see,
when we say, ” I just want to be present in the moment and see where this goes,” or ” Let’s just keep it casual for now and get to know each other.”
What we are saying or accepting here is:
😳I am not committed to the process, a fact I cannot even make a commitment. I don’t even want to put that much effort into this thing. I just want companionship, connection and sex with ease. 🤔🤯😳
😍But I love you.🥰
LOL…
That my beautiful, soulful, intelligent woman is NOT love.
What is love?
What does it mean when we say, ” I love you.”
Well to most people there in today’s world, those words roll off our tongues with far too much ease. They are words that are meant to hold the other in a position that we can make use of until we have decided if we want to explore more or not.
That is why so many people intodays dating world keep their daating profiles open, keep opposite sex relationships handy and call them “friends.” We don’t get commitment or love.
👉👉👉I love you should mean…
👩❤️💋👨I am here. I am not caught up on someone else, not my ex or another. I am not looking anywhere else and I am willing and wanting to close the doors to other options.
👩❤️💋👨You matter to me. You are a valuable, important person to me and in my life and I want to treat you as such.
👩❤️💋👨WE matter! The you and the me matter, and I value our unity.
👩❤️💋👨I’ve got your back. No matter what, I will support you. I will not run. I will not hide or turn away. I want to protect you. Protect us. I am making a stand for us. For you.
👩❤️💋👨I’m not going anywhere. Basically means I am ALL in!
👩❤️💋👨I only want you! I am passionate about you. I want to go deeper with you. I am open to you fully. I cannot see past you nor am I looking.
Our current dating and relating world does not operate from what love really is.
We treat love as though it is only a feeling or some mood.
The reality is that love requires our commitment.
It requires our commitment to the process of discovery of each other without and before we go after the surface level needs and desires of companionship, connection and sex.
The majority of relationships today that I see are not based in love or commitment.
People accept friends with benefits, casual relationships and situational unlabeled relationships as some form of actual relationship and even love.
But there is zero to no commitment to the relationship.
All either side is wanting to gain from it is companionship, connection and sex.
And when they go a little deeper and find themselves married or living together they discover some hard realities that they become shocked by.
😳👉👉There is no compatibility.
There is no desire to build a life together that is supportive of each other or a communion of the two.
From the very beginning of the courting process,
if you are truly looking for that soulmate…
wanting a lasting love and wanting commitment.
Then you MUST commit to the process of vetting.
And the key to vetting in dating is to ask yourself and your potential partner the right questions.
👊Know what you want.
👊Know what you don’t want.
Know your values.
Ask their values.
Box check about the important things.
Not the surface level, cover of the book things.
Get out of the mind set of egoic love which is based on each person caring only about their needs and what they are getting out of the relationship.
Instead gravitate toward co-creating the relationship and being compassionate in your relating. What can I give in this relationship? How do I see this relationship developing?
👊👊👊TIME TO GET REAL!!! 👊👊👊
👉Why am I here doing this relationship?
👉What’s my purpose for doing this relationship?
👉Is there an end destination or am I just wanting to enjoy the present moment and go with the flow?
Soulmate relationships require your commitment and your desire to tap into who you really are and what you want for your life.
If you are just playing around…
then stop effing around and saying you are looking for love but have bad luck with men.
It’s your commitment not the men.
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers
Helping dynamite powerful souls like yourself discover love and fulfilment is what my passion is. Over the last two decades I have worked with hundreds of women & men such as yourself to call in their soulmate by aligning to their truth. I have guided countless couples not to just rekindle a love that they thought was lost, but to create an empowered turned on and fully aligned partnership based in love with 8 simple steps. If you are a woman or man who is looking for happiness, love and abundance in life and is sick and tired of just getting by, reach out to me for a FREE Clarity Call today where we will define exactly what is holding you back, what you are wanting to call in and the next best steps to achieve your desired life. Message me to set up your FREE Clarity Call today.