HOW TO GET YOUR MAN TO REUNITE WITH YOU FIERCELY.

THERE I WAS LAYING IN HIS ARMS, HAND ON HIS CHEST, HEAD RESTING NEXT TO IT.
We were entangled, like we are each night as we fall asleep.
Yet tonight I felt a million miles between us.
The feeling of isolation was harsh and cold.
I was concerned.
My heart ached.
My mind raced.
And my desire was to inquire.
I wanted to ask him what was bothering him.
At my core I knew the cause.
I recognized where the distance seeped in.
Where the armour came up.
I knew that it was not me.
Nor anything that I had done.
I knew that it was the emotional armour of protection for our relationship that was coming up and being witnessed in this very moment. And it infuriated me that this seemingly “tiny” event from an outside perspective could put such a large space between us.
Earlier in the day I felt it.
I felt it as soon as it happened.
I am far too empathic and connected to him to not feel the subtle changes in his energy and emotions, I can read him. His microscopic expressions. But most of all I feel him.
So how could I not be aware of this change.
This armour that got picked up in such haste.
Moments before we were laughing, connecting, in joy and playful with each other.
And so I had spent the day wanting to chase after him with my inquiry.
I had spent the day pressing myself ever so close to him,
quietly begging him to put down the shield that he had picked up to protect not just him but both of us, our relationship, and our love.
The thing is, the great masculine cannot put down the shield so quickly once it has been picked up.
A man, in his heart, is vulnerable with his woman.
He allows her to lead him deeper into his heart and soul,
into his feelings, his emotions. She carries him to heights that he cannot take himself alone. However, no matter how surrendered he is to her, outside pressures and threats can cause him to go into protection mode. Sometimes, the things his woman says or does can trigger his wounding from the feminine as well and cause him to retreat, armour and protect.
No matter the reason for his armouring, once he picks up that shield and sword, he is bracing for impact. He is witnessing the slightest changes in the environment, he becomes the protector. The hunter. The guardian. The warrior.
And this is his divine nature as man.
And we women…
We fear the warrior as much as we love him and desire him.
We fear the hunter as much as we need him.
We fear the protector as much as we respect him.
We fear the guardian and much as we want to be called his queen.
We do not understand how he can retreat from us.
Walk away from us.
Close down to us.
To our love.
To his feelings.
His heart.
And so it is that we do what women have been doing for all of time. We do the “typical” female thing and we chase, with our words and inquiries, our proding to understand and our emotional support. We chase him physically when he needs to escape our emotions and his own. We accuse him of not caring.
We accuse him of running from us.
We accuse him in our fear of losing him.
When in truth if we just allowed him his space he would go,
sure enough he would pull away from us and we would be forced to deal with our own emotional wounding of the masculine and of abandonment, but if we women focused on healing our wounds and regaining our own truth, becoming self-empowered and stable inside ourselves, then we would see something magical happen with his pull away.
HE WOULD REUNITE WITH US FIERCELY.
This dance of the masculine and feminine,
the picking up of armour and the guiding back to his masculine heart, can only be done through the strength of a wise and loving feminine.
My dear women, it is up to us to guide our men back to us and thus his own heart.
But not through force.
Not through chasing them.
This process is much like putting a rubber band on your finger and pulling it away. If you allow the rubber band to stretch out as far as it needs to go until it is ready to release, it will retract back to its natural state with the greatest speed and impact.
It will snap back into place.
But if you just remove the finger that was holding the tension,
holding the stability, then it just flops back into position.
And the finger is no longer part of the scenario.
When we women chase our men with a “need” to understand and out of fear, we are no longer the stability our man needs from us, nor do we create the tension that is needed for desire, love and the shields to drop. We in turn end up mothering our man and causing an imbalance in the polarities of the relationship. After a long enough time, this causes separation and distrust in the relationship.
On both sides.
A woman will never respect a man that she is mothering.
If a woman feels she has to coddle her man, he is no longer a man, he is but a boy.
And if a man is being coddled by his woman like his mother, he cannot have desire for her. If his desire for her starts to diminish he will no longer be able to view her as his queen, but instead disconnect from his heart with her as he cannot trust her to hold the tension from her side to support the relationship.
Men need to escape the feminine to recenter themselves and come back to the feminine.
They do not need their woman to be their therapist or mother.
As much as a man does need to communicate his emotions and feelings, doing so must only be done when he is unarmoured with her so that he can trust himself and feel.
FOR THE FEMININE HOLDING SPACE IS TO LISTEN HER.
FOR THE MASCULINE HOLDING SPACE IS TO ALLOW EMOTIONAL AND POTENTIALLY PHYSICAL SPACE WITHOUT THE CHASE.
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
 
Ready to claim your life back from suffering, fear, doubt and misfortune? Ready to call in the love relationship you desire. The abundance you crave for and the joy you know can be yours.
This Is what I have worked with thousands of people like yourself to have over the last two decades. Reach out to me today.

I WANT TO NEED HIM – The Tale of Today’s Feminine Surrender.

I WANT TO NEED HIM.

 

This is a statement that a woman made to me as we were speaking about her couple-hood.

 

As I listened to her tale of desire to want to need her man,

that she believed that this is the way that we were designed,

and that so much of our discontent in relationships and life as well as not knowing ourselves comes from this very belief that we women “should not” need men.

That we are just as good and can balance life without a significant other, I thought to myself,

 

SHE IS ABSOLUTELY CORRECT.

 

Women have burdened themselves with the disease of believing that we don’t need men, that it is a sign of weakness. That we are lower than human if we rely on our male counterparts. Or that if we are relying on them that we are selling ourselves for a lifestyle, for safety.

 

And so many women do, do just this.

They settle into relationships not for soul union, not for love, but for comfort and safety. They look at the man’s resume, not his heart.

 

These women are indeed selling themselves.

They are becoming slaves to a lifestyle and a comfort.

They are not acting from soul or love.

 

And to them I could write a million lines,

but today I am addressing the women who are afraid of being perceived this way.

So much so, that they armour themselves from beautiful relationships, they fight to be seen strong at all cost, they feel weak at the thought of receiving help from their man. They do not know how to be supported by the masculine.

 

I am one of these women.

So I share from the depths of my feminine heart on this topic.

I am one of those women that has a ridiculous time receiving from my man.  I have learned through the years to allow him to open doors, to help grab the groceries, to let him help me in house and home. I have gotten over him not cumming every time we make love or him focusing all his attention on my pleasure and not receiving physically in times.

 

I have learned that  his pleasure sometimes is all about my receiving in our sexual union.

 

I  have learned that he loves to witness me in rapture.

That he feels great pleasure and satisfaction in my bliss.

In what he gives to me.

 

But, when it comes to money.

When it comes to bills.

When it comes to buying the groceries.

Medical things.

Needs.

 

Even if it is a trinket that I have my eye on and he asks me, do you want that? He is ready to purchase it for me. He wants to bring me pleasure. He wants to see me adorned. He wants my happiness.

I know this. But I feel like I am taking from him.

That I should not need this.

That it is not okay.

That he will perceive me as a woman who is there for the financial support.

 

And I am scared to lean on him.

I am scared that he will see me as weak.

As needy.

That my heart and love will be missed some how,

that my truth that  I have only eyes and desire for him will be washed over in some way because he has “helped” me.

 

When in truth, it is not even him helping me.

It is a union.

It is a team.

It is US, supporting the whole together.

And it is my pride that stands in the way of the full union.

It is my pride that screams that I should not need him, all the while my soul feels just like the woman above.

 

I WANT TO NEED HIM.

Because I DO!

 

I need his strong masculine guidance.

His leadership.

His logic.

His foresight.

I need his looks of love and adoration.

I need his tenderness.

His humor.

I need his touch.

I need his heart.

I need him to need me.

 

And I do not look at him as though he is weak for wanting me.

Or for needing me.

I know that he needs my feminine heart,

my emotions and touch.

He needs to see my rapture and my tears so he can fully feel who he is at his depth as well.

 

I know that he wants to need me.

 

We both have lived without each other just fine.

We both have been more than capable of living life and supporting our loved ones, building lives, businesses and we could easily choose to continue to do just that.

 

But the union of the masculine and the feminine when done by soul, is a union of desire to be together because together we are stronger.

Together we feel more.

We heal deeper.

We expand fully.

 

It’s not about money or security.

Although together we thrive all the more as well.

 

It’s not about weakness in coming together.

Or comfort.

 

It’s uncomfortable in truth to be vulnerable and wide open with someone. To have no hold backs.

To feel as though there are no barriers,

nothing you do not want seen or felt.

To want to be witnessed at the deepest levels by your mate,

is uncomfortable AF!

 

There is no hiding here.

And we women, hold back from needing our men deeply,

and wanting to need them,

we in turn tell God/Universe that we don’t need them either.

 

It’s hypocritical of us women to say that we are these brilliant life givers, thus manifestors, creators, powerhouses and to know that we are vessels born to receive and then say NO to receiving because we deem it a weakness because it comes from our man.

 

How are we to ever fully become our greatest selves if we consistently deny our receiving, our pleasure, support, love from the great masculine?

 

No wonder we women are lost. 

No wonder so many of us are bitter, non-orgasmic, always choose the wrong man who lets us down. 

We should expect all of this and know that we have set ourselves up for suffering in love, 

To never feel fully loved or cherished because we are not cherishing ourselves. 

It is through our ability to lean into the masculine, to open our hearts and put down our armour with a man that holds us close and wants to need us as well, who gets that he is our king, our knight, our protector and great lover. That through his honor and ability to carry us deeper into ourselves that we find ourselves. 

 

 

It is my belief, and a belief that “just might” be backed by a few spiritual scriptures and structures out there as well, that we are meant to support each other. The equal yoking of the masculine and feminine. 

 

THE DESIRE TO BE ROMANCED LIES DEEP IN THE HEART OF EVERY WOMAN.

IT IS FOR SUCH THAT YOU WERE MADE.

 

I love this quote by John Eldredge.

 

However, for us to  have that desire manifest, we women must open ourselves to God first, 

We must learn to listen to our hearts, our soul, our intuition. We must then open ourselves and lay down the shields and swords of our wounded little girls and let the conscious masculine hold us. 

Love us. 

See us fully. 

We must be open to needing him. 

And we must want to need him. 

 

It is only through our wanting, 

And our understanding that, that wanting is not a weakness but a powerful space of abundance, flow and love, 

That we gain the opportunity to experience true soul union.

 

Our union with our man mirrors our union with the divine, with God.

The trust we show our mate, 

The surrender, 

The rapture, 

The need, 

The wanting.

 

We captivate our men for a reason.

It is because through us he feels life.

 

And we are lifted by his true heart and desire to serve us.

So if you are a woman like myself who struggles with receiving from the masculine, 

If you feel weak or like you will be misperceived in your wanting of his support, his love, his attention, look no further than your heart. 

Ask your truth there. 

And see him as God.

Wanting your rapture in all of life. 

 

As Always, 

Stop Existing & Start Living

WE ARE THE ONLY SPECIES THAT WANTS TO GO AGAINST OUR BIOLOGY.

WE ARE THE ONLY SPECIES THAT WANTS TO GO AGAINST OUR BIOLOGY.

 

Well, mostly we women that is.

Guys will claim THIS, but somewhere inside they get it is not so, they know that they claim it to just keep that doorway there,

where we women tend to want to disregard, ignore and act as though we are above our biology.

 

It was not that long ago that I was one of these women myself.

I thought that I could manage it.

I truly believed that I could have the relationship and it just be what I was calling it and that both parties were feeling the same way.

I believed that we were elevated in consciousness to the level that sexual desire did not play a role and that I could seriously “just be friends” with my male friends and that they were down for it just being that and even wanted just that.

 

THEN I came into the awareness that most if not all of my male friends were actually attracted to me and that if given the opportunity would happily walk through the door of a sexual encounter with me.  So I justified the friendship by saying that they respected me and my wishes and that it was manageable.

I came to terms, with if a guy was hanging out in my life as a friend of some nature that he most likely wanted to bed me and I then believed that that was just the way it was and I had to accept it, but could still have the friendships, just needed to be aware.

 

After all, I am one of those women who has never not had a male friendship since I was 2 – years old.

I have had far more “good” friendships with men than with women over the course of my life.

The thought of giving up my male friendships pained me.

Feeling as though I would have no one left in my true friendship circle if I dumped the guys.

 

Then I had a few conversations with my son’s who are grown and almost grown, with some of these male friends, with male clients and even with my man.

 

Their shares can be summed up here,

“Why would I hang out with a female if I was not attracted to her? If I wanted to hang out for all the reasons we guys hang out and do what we guys do, then I would certainly choose to hang out with a guy friend, not a female.”

 

They all came back with, if they were hanging with a female there were desires to be with her intimately.

 

And I started to really allow myself to feel this.

To get right with male/female relating.

I looked at my conversations, my shared moments with the majority of my male friends and saw the intimateness.

Sure there was no sex, there was no kissing or intimate touch, but we certainly did share intimacy. Only the kind of intimacy that you can get from the opposite sex.

 

That vibe.

That feeling.

There was even a flirtiness at times.

 

Beautiful as it is, it is ground that is not stable.

And no matter how respectful and loyal a male friend can be to us women, if given the opportunity to have a door crack open and him get a chance to be with us, he will.

Meaning that if you are a committed woman, in any label of relationship out there (and I have been under a few labels over the course of the last two decades) that if you are pissed, upset, feeling disconnected in any fashion or form with YOUR MAN, and you share confidence with a male friend, know that you are cracking a door open.

 

If you are a single woman and you have guy friends,

and believe that they can maintain without issues,

understand first you are almost being cruel to the men in your life,

because without realizing it you are teasing them.

Yes just by being you.

Just by doing you.

 

If you want to be taken on dates,

experience the male energy,

etc. then perhaps looking at doing just that is the answer.

GO ON A DATE.

 

And realize that often the best romantic and intimate relationships are based in friendship.

The fact that you think of a man as a good friend,

If you have a trust, a vulnerability there, a fun playfulness with your male friend and you are both open to a relationship that is of more than your pseudo friendship, then maybe the universe has already blessed you with a wonderful man to explore in a romantic fashion.

 

If you are good with just “managing” these male relationships and keeping them at bay in some fashion, ask yourself:

 

💃 What am I really gaining from this friendship or looking for with it if I know that he wants me sexually but is just holding back because of what I have stated the boundaries are?

💃 How can this male friendship impact (positively /negatively) an intimate relationship I am in or want to be in?

💃 If I was in an intimate relationship with someone and they were having deep conversations, moments and connections of a vulnerable/intimate yet non-sexual version with another woman frequently what sort of impact would that have on the relationship? Emotionally? Physically?Energetically?

💃 What does significant other or primary relationship mean to me and how does opposite sex relationships outside of this hinder or support?

 

Now, I know what you might be feeling.

You may say, that is such an emotionally immature way of looking at relationships.

You may say that a “conscious man” is above this.

You may say that there is zero harm from being flirty with your male friends, no matter if you are in a romantic relationship or not with someone else.

You may actually believe and point to lifelong friendships that have never let you down and you are certain that they are “just a brother” to you.

 

I have thought all of this.

I have believed all of this.

And repeatedly been blown out of the water from these.

 

We cannot deny our biology.

Men are men.

Women are women.

And we relate differently.

We bond differently.

 

Men love boobs, booty, legs, hair, our eyes and are wanting to  explore us inside and out.

 

They will smile, chat it up, be helpful and drive from a state away to to  show us how much they want to  give us their attention.

They will support us in the worst of times.

They will applaud us in the best of times.

 

And they mean it.

But they still want the woman that stands before them.

They would not be putting their attention on us if they did not desire us in some fashion.

 

This is why so many men fall in the face of a woman’s attention.

Wars have been based, fought and won for the chance to be with a woman.

 

It’s just biology.

 

We women need to get right with it and stop being silly,

thinking that it’s harmless however.

 

Time to level up your relating.

 

As Always,

Stop Existing & Start Believing

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

 

Ready to claim your life back from suffering, fear, doubt and misfortune? Ready to call in the love relationship you desire. The abundance you crave for and the joy you know can be yours.

This Is what I have worked with thousands of people like yourself to have over the last two decades. Reach out to me today.

THIS IS THE MOST UNDERVALUED THING IN LOOKING FOR GUIDANCE TODAY.

THANK HEAVENS MY GRANDSON’S HEART TRANSPLANT WAS DONE BY AN EXCELLENT SURGEON WITH EXPERIENCE.
Right?
I mean can you imagine if the task had been handed over to a store clerk or a mechanic?
That sounds crazy right?
We would never allow that to happen.
Surgery of any kind is serious business.
It’s our health, our life.
It bears serious implications if not done well.
So of course you would never think to turn over the knife to someone who does not know how to use it or understand the human body.
Yet we do this frequently in other parts of our life.
We do it with ease.
We do not even stop to hesitate.
We just lay it all down and take the best priced option typically.
Or the quickest sounding.
We may ask if they have understanding, experience or degrees but we don’t slow down and actually inquire about their hands on knowledge.
And depending on what area of life you are asking for help and guidance in, the person you are turning toward may need certain skill sets or wisdom about what “could” happen or how things work in the real world, not just what they read in a textbook or saw on a training video.
I would say that you get what you pay for,
However our new world which has an on sloth of “experts ” and “guru’s” reveals something totally different in my opinion.
Being part of many coaching communities I see tons of new coaches coming on board, building their businesses, working with people, learning from mistakes as we all do and also getting told,
“Just proclaim yourself an expert in the field and you are one.”
This is the truth though.
If someone proclaims themselves such.
If someone shows up enough on social media and in livestreams.
If someone writes well and can be believable to some level.
If someone puts on the face that others want to see for that trade.
THEN…
They are experts.
They suddenly have wisdom that they did not earn.
They suddenly can just lean on tales they have heard as their own and make others believers of their experiences.
They are foxy little wolves in sheeps clothing for sure.
And this is what our world is full of.
It’s frustrating to myself and I am sure to others out there in the world who see this occurrence happening daily.
We see the damage that it causes.
The relationships that it destroys.
The pain and suffering that individuals are going through because of poor leadership and guidance.
But we as a society do not value experience.
REAL LIFE EXPERIENCE.
We want the virgin to give us the mind blowing sex tips.
We want the priest to tell us what to expect in the delivery room.
We want the mechanic to tell us how to build our health practice.
We want the person who has never been in a relationship to share the best strategies on how to deal with our mate.
We want the person who eats nothing but fast food and is sedentary to show us how to get the body and health of our dreams.
It’s worse than asking the devil for the steps to get to the kingdom of heaven. Sure he may know them, but is he likely going to share them? And what he does share are you going to blindly trust because he says I know God.
At least the devil does know God.
Is a fallen angel.
And does know what it takes to get there.
But we rely on those who do not know their bum from a hole in the ground for vital, life altering guidance in so many areas of life and we do so just because they have proclaimed something.
Because we are to effing lazy to inquire.
To pay attention.
To do the research.
To listen to our intuition about someone.
Or we hand the reins over because they are cheaper or claim to get quicker results.
Or give us answers that feel more comfortable than the truth.
They were nice.
They were pretty.
They had a nice voice.
I liked their shirt.
Experience.
It truly is the most undervalued thing we have these days.
We do not value wisdom.
We have lost ourselves in some strange concept that youthfulness is powerful and wise.
Wisdom is built on the foundation of failure.
And failure only comes from life experience.
Learning what works and what does not.
Wisdom, life skill, understanding…
TAKES TIME.
But you want it quick.
You want it handed to you.
And that will cost you dearly.
But at least you may learn from your error and gain wisdom.
Right?
So there is something good after all to come from choosing poor leadership and guidance.
What area are you feeling you may need support in?
What subject area of your life needs guidance from someone who has walked there before and come through the thick of it only to rise back into the light, a stronger, more wise soul?
Will you choose wisely those you allow to guide your life, your love, your money, your freedom and health?
Or will you do what is easiest?
As Always,
In service.
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
Ready to claim your life back from suffering, fear, doubt and misfortune? Ready to call in the love relationship you desire. The abundance you crave for and the joy you know can be yours.
This Is what I have worked with thousands of people like yourself to have over the last two decades. Reach out to me today.

How I lost 18 Pounds in 4 months with Zero Effort, Only Doing One THING!

👉👉👉CAN A MAN BE THE BEST WEIGHT MANAGEMENT SYSTEM, SLEEP AGENT AND STRESS REDUCER OUT THERE?

 

The right man certainly can be.🤯

Today I speak to all the 👑queens out there who look in the mirror, do those little sidewards poses sucking in your tummies, checkin’ out how the booty looks in those pants, if the “girls” are perky looking today or if you need to grab the extra support bra. How your eyes look. Are you needing extra concealer, are the lines, soft wrinkles and exhaustion from life showing up to boldly or…💃💃💃

 

Today I am sharing a revelation with you that I have witnessed over the course of time in different ways in my own personal life and with friends and clients alike.

 

But when I tell you that from a VERY personal and real level, I have never been through such a beautiful transformation as the one that I am in currently in and it all stems from the love of the right man. Now, don’t get me wrong here…

it’s not actually his action of love that is doing anything.

Its not a massive amount of sex.

It’s not really anything other than I can put down all my armour with him and surrender.

 

🤯Whoa…

 

Did you catch that big scary word that most queens do not like to speak outloud?

 

SURRENDER.

 

Lay down our armour?🦸‍♀️

Put down the shields and sword?⚔️

Trust the MF masculine?

 

I know, I have gone off the deep end for some of you ladies out there. In todays time when we women are able to be self-sufficent and not need relationship, just have the sex we want, when we want and live our lives without the bartering with a man, the concept of surrendering to the masculine seems shear ludicrous and crazy.

 

I get it.

 

But are you fulfilled?

Sure you may believe that you are.

You got the career, the kids, the house, the money, the “freedom” but where do you allow yourself to be held?

Where do you allow your softness as the feminine to be revealed?

And if you are a coupled queen, do you truly let your king shine as a man or do you constantly overthrow his throne with your fear of being controlled by him?

 

Do you in essence cuckold your man?😲🤔🤯

You “give him sex” but you do not actually receive him or let him receive you?

 

Coupled or single,

What we desire in a relationship on both sides of the coin is connection.

Put simply connection DOES NOT come from two physical bodies engaging in sex or physical touch.

Connection comes from emotional bonding and trust.

Connection comes from being able to embody one’s self with deep presence and thus can actually feel at an emotional and energetic level their partner.

They are willing to reveal themselves fully.

They are willing to be seen authentically.

They are willing to be naked in every way with their lover.

 

These things can NEVER be achieved with our armour up.

These things cannot happen without surrender from our deepest heart center with our lover.

 

And as long as we choose to uphold that emotional/energetic armour in our sexing, in our relationships, with our intimacy we will also bear the effects of the armour which are actual weight of the physical body.

Stress of the mind.

Emotional overload and imbalances.

We will not be able to lay our heads down and truly rest.

Because the weight of life,

the guarding of our hearts,

and the exhaustion of us “acting out a role for survival” will only create restlessness of our souls.

 

When we enter a soulmate relationship,

a union with our true significant other we have zero desire to hold onto our swords and weapons. We do not want barriers to our heart.

 

👊👊👊We want UNION.

Zero space between.

 

And when we truly enter a relationship of this divine nature we also reap the rewards here in the physical if we are willing to surrender to this sort of depth and authentic connection in love.

 

WE STAND NAKED IN EVERY WAY BEFORE OUR SOULMATE.

 

And here we find our truest freedom.

Our most unbound love.

We discover who we really are,

and we open ourselves to him.

 

And he as a heart centered man,

strong in his masculine and purpose driven in his life understands that the way he penetrates your heart as his queen is also how he penetrates his world.

He must lean fully into your gates in love and trust of the feminine or he his lack of surrender will be felt and you will not be able to trust him.

 

However you my dear queen must remember that it is a two way street ALWAYS.

 

If you as a woman refuse to trust yourself,

if you refuse to get out of your mind space,

If you refuse to speak your truth,

if you refuse to take responsibility for your emotions, your orgasms, your choices, your triggers and your fear,

then he cannot lean into your gates in trust.

 

A king cannot lead his queen to the most delicious moments of connection and intimacy if his queen does not respect him in his masculine.  And a queen can never respect a king who does not know whom he is and who has healthy boundaries and a stable heart center.

 

So can a man be the best weight management system, sleep agent and stress reducer out there?

 

Yes the right man certainly can.

The right man + the right woman can conquer their world together.

They will thrive and live unbound in their love.

They will be healthy physically, emotionally, sexually, financially and spiritually.

 

Unfortunately it is my opinion from my over two decades of working with couples that the harsh reality is that about 85% of unions are not soul based but need based.

Survival based.

 

And it shows my dear queen in your face.

In your eyes.

In your body.

In how you speak of yourself.

In how you show up in your life.

 

I love you beautiful.

You are worthy of a king that is worthy of you.

 

But you have to first want to find him and then be willing to lay down your armour.

 

As Alway,

Loving you from 18 pounds lighter,  radiance in my face and eyes, a good night’s sleep in my mans arms and lovin’ the skin I am in with a surrendered heart to my King 👑

 

Stop Existing & Start Living

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

 

Queens let’s chat about getting you back into your rightful throne.

Based in that beautiful heart center, let me show you the steps to putting down the armour with your soulmate or how to call in your soulmate if that’s where you are at and how to fully become embodied in love and orgasm today.

FAR FROM F-CKING PERFECT…

FAR FROM F-CKING PERFECT.

That’s what I am.
And no matter where one goes,
There one still is.

That’s the life lesson we all need to learn.
Funny how we want to hide and mask who we are. We want to put under cover our imperfections or ride on the coat tails of those things that truly don’t make us who we are.
We want to flaunt our genius and our trauma.
In hopes that others will think grander of what we have overcome, when in truth the most powerful soul aligned and beautiful thing we can ever do is surrender to our perfectly imperfect humanness.

That surrender is shown with our ability to laugh and let go of all our needs of acting like we got it all goin’ on and perfect.
As though we have no troubles,
We have no doubts.
We have life figured out.
As though we know ourselves when the last thing we ever reveal is truth in who we are.

The soul that let’s the ego stand embarrassed is a soul on fire with self-love.

If you are anything like me,
You may find yourself looking in the mirror,
Judging yourself.
Your body.
Your finances.
Your life choices.
You may make excuses and call bullsh*t on yourself all in the same moment.

You may sit with your lover and wonder what they see in you.
Why are they still hanging out?
And in the same feel ever so grateful for the unconditional deep love they bring you into.

You may find yourself not wanting to mess up in life.
You may be super self critical and know that there is so much more that you could be and should be doing, hoping that no one discovers just how human you really are.

How far from f-cking perfect you actually reside.

Oh but baby,
You know what is beautiful beyond measure?
You know what show’s courage and strength like no other?

Taking the mask down.
Allowing yourself to see all those imperfections and loving yourself all the more.
Letting joy and play bless your life,
Knowing that when you truly connect,
Armour down with those you love,
That this is soul alignment.

That feeling.
That feeling of beauty that washes through you.
That feeling of happiness that shows itself upon your face.
That feeling of love that fills your heart.
That is truly who you are,
When you stand revealed in authenticity.

That is your soul aligned.
That is your truth.

And when you hide and run from what you deem imperfections, flaws and weakness you hide from YOU.
You hide from your strength.
Your Love.
And you stand in armour before those you love.

So go now,
Look in the mirror of self-criticism and hatred,
Smile into those beautiful eyes of yours,
Run your hands across that body in gratitude for the temple that it is and all that it allows you to experience.
Stand there and speak up your life.
Speak up your heart.
Speak up your truth,
And laugh at all those human imperfections.

You are beautiful beyond measure.

In love from my f-cking imperfect temple to yours,
Remember,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers “

Trust, Truth & Establishing Rock Solid In Couplehood.

OUR TRUST IS BUILT ON THE FOUNDATION OF TRUTH…

But is that true?

 

We would like to believe that it is just this way,

however if we are honest with ourselves there is something that is so much more rare, more important and powerful in letting us know that we can trust someone…

 

All relationships need trust in order to be successful.

For us to open to love fully,

to surrender our deepest hearts to another,

to open our bodies to pleasure with our mate,

or to reveal our pain,

we must have TRUST.

 

Through the course of time and engagement with different people in different relationships we learn that trust is hard to have.

We discover that many people all though they “think” themselves trustworthy, believe that they are worthy of being trusted and that their actions and words support that more than often it is not so.

More frequently then not we learn that those that we trust in are acting from a self-centered aspect only giving of themselves and speaking out of a desire to receive and therefore will make themselves into anything needed to be perceived as steadfast and true.

 

But a person who does not know themselves,

who is not able to be true to their own thoughts, feelings and needs and is willing to “pretend” or mask is a person that is far from trustworthy.

 

Only when we can stand firm in self,

uneeding of anyone else to affirm to us that we are good, loveable, worthy, trustworthy, etc. can we be true to someone else.

 

And that is what we are wanting in our relationships.

Especially in our most intimate primary love relationships.

We want to know that our partner is true.

 

We want to know that if the sh*t were to hit the fan that they are there for us, no matter.

We want to know that they have our backs in battle and in love.

We want to know that even if they do not agree with us that they value the relationship more than they value being right or making a point.

 

We want ROCK SOLID.

 

And rock solid comes from unshakable trust in each other.

Trust is established, built and supported not by truth but by support of each other despite opinions, beliefs and even truth.

Trust must come from a harmony of knowing that we are supported fully but also that our partner will be honest with us.

 

Meaning that they will always share their feelings and thoughts around things no matter how different or challenging, but will not allow for those feelings and thoughts to take center stage and offset the unity and foundation of the relationship.

 

There must be an understanding that there is a difference between truth and honesty.

 

Truth is subject to one’s own perception and experiences and then made into a fact unless scientifically revealed. Even our own truth in history is subject to opinion and written by those who conquered for the most part. Often truth is based in a need to be right or to set something straight.

 

Where honesty, although still subject to one’s own perceptions and experience is a sharing of our core views, beliefs and feelings. True honesty is based on surrender and trust of being received.

 

OUR TRUST IS BUILT ON SUPPORT.

 

If you know that you cannot fall, how far can you go in life?

What sort of life challenges can you overcome?

 

If you know that there is no goodbye in your relationship, how deep can you surrender to your soul and into the revealing of it with another?

 

If you know that even if you are wrong in a choice or opinion that your back is had in every turn without question, how much more powerful and even able to hear and see the truth could you be?

 

Trust equals freedom to be you and surrender fully into the relationship.

How are you showing up for your love?

 

As Always,

Stop Existing & Start Living

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

 

Explore the depths of what is needed to build trust and enjoy a rock solid commitment with your partner.  Reach out to me for my elite couples coaching today.

 

LISTEN TO IN COUPLEHOOD TRUTH VS. SUPPORT LIVESTREAM NOW.

HOW TO MANIFEST YOUR GREATEST LOVE STORY OF THIS LIFETIME.

YOU OPEN UP TO A RELATIONSHIP A THOUSAND FOLD DEEPER, MORE LOVING, MORE FULFILLING AND STRONGER WHEN YOU DO THIS…
My heart was broken.
My trust was broken.
I felt abandoned, lost, unlovable and could never see myself in love again at this level. How could I? He was “the one,” he was the one who opened me at levels of my soul I had never touched, my heart shuddered and longed for him. I was ignited when we were together and I felt like I was in heaven.
And when he chose to say good-bye…
I was crushed.
I clung to the idea of him coming back to me,
I could see him knocking on my door and asking for me to forgive him, that he was mistaken. I convinced my heart and mind that our energetic connection was untouchable.
I told myself that THIS lost love was as good as it got.
I had settled on this concept.
The idea of him. Of us. And that I simply had to remain loyal to him by keeping my heart unattached.
This idea grew to bitterness and a deeper sadness as months went by and they turned to years and he never knocked.
But I had built him into this idea in my head and attached such emotion to it that I armoured myself up to everything and everyone else.
I would date.
I would explore.
I even got into a longer standing, seemingly “committed” relationship and the outside world would say,
“She has moved on. She has healed. She is loving again.”
However my internal world was a drastic F-ck No! to it all.
Stuck in the quicksand of yesteryear with my heart still broken and clinging to the idea and the longing of his love.
I called into my life everything that was not for me.
I called in what would soon need to be let go of.
And I blinded myself to the possibilities of something grander than what I could have dreamt of possible with my lost love.
So blind I was.
So stuck, that I missed him.
I missed the soul that was knocking at my door.
I missed the soul that could take me further, carry me higher, expand my heart into the omniverses and beyond.
And I missed him because of my stubbornness and false loyalty to a love that was no longer mine for the keeping.
One day though something happened.
One day I grew so weary of carrying all this pain and fear of letting go that I just sat it down somewhere along the path.
I was done mourning.
I was done being smaller than what I was born to be.
I was done denying myself the love that I wanted, the connection that my soul craved for, and I was done holding up all this emotional armour to protect myself from ever feeling that sort of pain again,
While speaking words to the opposite and saying that all I wanted was my soulmate love.
Rock solid love and commitment.
A conscious man.
A relationship that was based in love and integrity.
A true union of the souls.
Yes that is what I was saying,
while holding up the armour on my heart and soul,
making sure that I could never be penetrated by such a love.
That day, that I sat the shield and sword down,
my heart cried. And with each tear I found myself awakening to the presence of something magical.
There he was.
Yet again.
He had not left me, he had just stepped back,
doing his own work, taking down his own armour,
identifying what he wanted and who he was at his core.
There he was.
And as I took him in with a soft breath in a hug shared,
my heart recognized.
Months passed,
the story built between us,
We danced on the field in this scary land where we were wanting, were recognizing and we were being asked to trust ourselves and each other. Until one day we could no longer deny,
we could no longer hide.
We could no longer use the shielding of our past loves and losses to hide the radiance of what we had together.
With a great senses of urgency we united,
the outside world questioning us.
Fighting against us even.
With each blow the world has given,
the bonds that entwine us grow ever stronger.
And here I sit today,
present to the beauty and the power.
Aware of the depth and amazed in each day how much deeper we go within each other.
As our hearts speak to one another,
our souls smile in the knowing.
Here he is.
Here he is each morning,
and every night,
He does not knock at my door.
No he does not.
But instead he takes my hand and places his heart within it.
Armour down from a day of battle with the world.
We lay together,
we breathe deep into each other,
feeling as though every cell of our earthly being has come home,
Not needing.
Not clinging.
A feeling of fully being seen, being witnessed and with it a desire.
A desire to jump all the way in.
A desire to melt together.
When we set down our armour,
when we let go of the self-imposed bondage of what we feel is lost,
when we let ourselves rise again,
we allow something unimaginable,
magical to form before us.
We allow someone greater.
More aligned.
To love us.
And our souls smile at our coming home.
To all those out there that have lost a great love,
who are clinging to the idea that that was as good as it gets,
that it can never be any more, any better.
No one can love you like that.
That it is not safe to open up to love again,
or that you owe that lost love some loyalty to hold on to it and be impenetrable to all others,
I share this musing today.
Drop your ideas that clinging to what is not yours for the keeping will ever support your desire for your heart’s true love.
It will only block.
Loving you from a scrumptious land,
deep in my heart.
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers and Lover’s”
 
Stop settling for your Bullsh*t Love!
You are the only thing that is preventing you from the love, the money and the life happiness that you so want for.
Are you ready to take a deep dive into clearing your sh*t once and for all and openning up to your greatness? Join me for the April Session of Unavavailble for BullSh*t! Reach out to me for deets now or go to
https://kendalwilliams.com/unavailable-for-bullsht-exclusive-program/
 
 
 
 
 

The THING You Need To Know To Call In Your Soulmate/Twinflame Relationship.

Jane Austen once said, ” When I fall in love it will be forever.”
A beautiful sentiment this statement brings to so many about love.
Romance. Intimacy and matters of the heart.
However, we often feel that we are in love when in truth we are in need and so we move from relationship to relationship looking for each soul we come in contact with to be the one, when it is an impossibility.
We “fall in love” because we are weak in whom we are and in need to feel complete, to feel loved, worthy, and needed. This falling process reveals to us that we are not whole beings, thus making anyone that we “fall in love” with not the one. We are unable to find the one until we elevate ourselves to a state of self-awareness and truth that matches our soul expression for this life experience and in order for us to unit with “the one” they too must be in pursuit of the same.
We desire to be in love.
To be elevated by love, not to fall.
Our soul understands that relationship, the true union of two souls coming together in love will not cause us to sacrifice any aspect of who our true self is, but instead it will ignite us and expand us as we unit. We get at a core level that love is based in freedom.
And our freedom is birthed through the observations that we make when we are united with another at a soul level.
When two souls unite in love they experience a bond that sets them each on fire, creating a purification process that must happen in order for the union to hold strong. This is what Jane Austen was referring to in her statement above, ” When I fall in love it will be forever,” because when two souls come together in such authentic love, they recognize each other and it is a bonding for life.
But not life as we know it.
It is the life of the soul.
This is where we speak of the term “soulmate” or “twinflame” and we simplify it into modern terms of “the one.” At our cores we are always in search of this eternal love, this union with what we feel is our other half and a soul that will complete us. The irony of it is that we must first become that that we wish to achieve through this union. In order for us to become whole we must become wise and wisdom comes from experience. We learn ourselves through others. The contrasting of relationships, the learning of our boundaries, our likes and dislikes in all areas of life and relating, what we need and what are non-negotiables. One cannot become whole in self until one understands themselves and can love the darkest aspects of self as well. Wholeness in self is created from a space of respect, responsibility, love, courage and ability to transform what is needed to advance one’s soul and life.
The most equipt learning ground for these soul transformations and union with soul is relationship.
Especially intimate relationships.
Once we unite with ourselves at a deep understanding (not a perfection) we open up the opportunity to magnetize to us a like soul that is on the same path, at the same velocity.
Frequencies match.
The souls most likely have shared much in common in this lifetime and others (if you believe in reincarnation), magnifying their bonds all the more. All other “love” relationships fall short, causing us suffering so that we can clarify whom we are and prepare ourselves for a true union with another.
To be in love with one’s soulmate is by far one of the greatest gifts we can extend to ourselves through our coming home to self, it is most certainly for a lifetime and it is not something that occurs with every relationship.
If you are among the many out there longing to discover love and wonder where Mr./Mrs. Right is…
Will you ever discover “the one?”
Why does love always hurt so bad and cause you such heartache?
Or simply why you are not finding the depth and connection that you know should be available and you have witnessed with others, then I ask you to realize one thing…
There are many that are not the one, as it should be.
There can only ever be “the one” and in order for you to achieve this soul union you must learn yourself and learn to love yourself.
This journey of love is based on your ability to be whole with whom you are and not look for anything outside of self.
Be willing and in love with the reality that you must walk away from anything that is not actually for you…
Including ALL “the ones” that are not YOUR ONE.
As Always,
Stop Existing & Start Living
“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”
💃💃💃ANNOUNCING BECOMING UNAVAILABLE FOR THAT FREE CONSULTS!
 
8 Pillars of Love, Money and Life Happiness
 
👉For a LIMITED Time.
These consults are open for the next 30 days only. (Feb. 20th to March 201th, 2021)
*All consults are FREE for this program.
*All consults are done on phone or FB livestream messenger.
*Consults are open to individuals and couples.
*Program is focused on 8 Pillars of Love, Money and Life Happiness.
*Find out the deets for this signature elite program that is opening up for registration to an elite 15 clients on April 1st, 2021.
* You must do the prerequisite of the consult to join this game changing, life altering mentoring opportunity.
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AND I CAME CRASHING BACK INTO MY HEART…JUST LIKE THAT.

AND I CAME CRASHING BACK INTO MY HEART… JUST LIKE THAT.

 

He grabbed me,

kissed me and pushed me back onto the bed.

I was rambling on and on about my frustration,

my anger. Lost in thought and the mind.

I was distant from him.

Distant from me.

And lost beyond measure.

I could not feel my heart,

in truth I did not even want to right then.

I had been triggered and I was pissed.

Not at him.

At life in general.

My flow had been disrupted,

I had allowed it to happen and I was out of control of my life in that instant. The chaos of kids, work, house and family stirred around me and I just wanted solitude and peace but had no way of obtaining it because inside I was a storm that I had not even slowed to recognize.

 

And that was what he did.

He slowed me.

He grabbed a hold of me and led me back to my heart.

That space that I was forced into feeling my truth.

That space where I knew I was not alone in this world,

that space where he was not going to let me run from him, from us, from me.

And he passionately took hold of me there.

He moved with clarity, direction and determination.

I tried to fight his lead.

My mouth was rambling, but he kissed me and would not take my ego based words.

I pushed up against him and ran from feeling him physically, mentally, emotionally.

But he tore off my clothes and laid me naked, vulnerable before him. Devouring my flesh like a hungry wild animal and forcing me to come back to him.

Pressing himself into me,

not letting me go.

I fought with myself to feel.

I fought with the urge to physically stop his love at that moment.

Where days before I found myself lost in a trance of our eyes gazing  during our sexing, here I lay closing my eyes and wanting to hide.

Hiding from the reveal of my soul.

Hiding from my pain in feeling lost and angry.

Hiding by throwing up my armour and not allowing myself to feel.

Not allowing his intensity to penetrate my core.

My armour was weakening.

And tears fell.

My chest became tense as I attempted to hold back my breaking,

the cracking of my armour, the cracking of my heart and the desire to fully open to his touch, his kiss, his presence, his love.

His breath softly moving across my breast,

my heart beat instensing,

I could feel him.

As I came back to him,

back to us,

back me,

he let out the affirming words of, “Yes. yes.yes.”

I knew that he too felt me dropping.

Felt me feeling him.

And as I laid down my armour my pleasure arose.

with mine his came too.

And I was drawn in.

I was seen.

I was held.

I was fulfilled.

And my trust grew.

 

————————————————————————–

 

This is the taking of the feminine that the masculine must learn.

It is in deep love and devotion.

It is in divine leadership and surrender all the saame,

and it is based in soul consciousness.

Often mistaken for control or for a desire to have one’s way,

the difference is in the emotional investment in the moment, in the relationship and the centeredness in self.

The masculine is meant to lead the femeine home to her heart.

And it is the masculine that must remain strong in these moments, strong in love. Not cowering to the feminines fires but standing firm in who they are and in their purpose beyond their mate, beyond their fear or ego or desire to control her fires, but in turn they must handle her with care and passion, clarity and direction. She must feel his leadership as well as his surrender to his own heart to be able to trust him to lead her back to her  own.

 

This is the dance.

 

As Always,

Stop Existing & Start Living

“Coaching for Grown A*s Believers”

 

💃💃💃ANNOUNCING BECOMING UNAVAILABLE FOR THAT FREE CONSULTS!

👉For a LIMITED Time.

These consults are open for the next 30 days only. (Feb. 20th to March 201th, 2021)

*All consults are FREE for this program.

*All consults are done on phone or FB livestream messenger.

*Consults are open to individuals and couples.

*Program is focused on 8 Pillars of Love, Money and Life Happiness.

*Find out the deets for this signature elite program that is opening up for registration to an elite 15 clients on April 1st, 2021.

* You must do the prerequisite of the consult to join this game changing, life altering mentoring opportunity.

Message me in comments or PM me with I am interested in UNAVAILABLE FOR THAT!

Today to set up your FREE Call now.