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Creating Desire – Cultivating a Sexual Practice

In Tantra and Sexuality Coaching there is much talk about sexual positions and skills. There is also talk about the healing rewards that such practices can bring to an individual or couple but what is often over looked in our western society and teachings is how important it is to develop a desire for MORE, deeper, penetrating, unconditional and healing events (weather they involve intercourse of not). Tantra is a practice. Just like yoga, meditation, or any other physical/emotional/mental training that we need to practice daily or at least a set amount of times per week or month. Tantra can only assist a person or couple to the degree that the individual is willing to put into it. I am often asked when starting a new relationship with a client, “How long is this coaching/counseling/healing/etc. going to take?” Because we operate in a world that is use to deadlines and use to statistics we can hardly fathom that such deep healing and opening has no such box. There are many things that play a role in our transformational process, from how much time and effort we are willing to dedicate to the painful truth that we really have no control over our cellular or spiritual structures and how quickly they release blockages and programs. All we can do from this physical reality is take one step at a time in belief that we will succeed. Listen to our hearts and stay as open to ourselves and the call of spirit as we can. A KEY factor to any healing work is DESIRE. One must first except that they need healing. They must first wake up to the reality that life can be more, it can be blissful and that there is no reason to just except what society says we have to live by. We are Unbound! We are Divine! We are Complete! We are Powerful.

Living Unbound, believing in what may seem taboo, out of the norm or even impossible is what makes us humans so incredible! Yet we fear all of this and for many we allow society and past patterns/blockages to STOP us from living. This is even true when it comes to our love making and our spiritual practices. These two things walk hand in hand with each other and together are great liberators of the human spirit. But how do we start a Sacred Sexual Practice?

Sexual Practices can:

  • Bring you closer as a couple
  • Cultivate more sexual energy that can manifest into life force drive and creative energy
  • Expand your Awareness
  • Empower your intentions (goals/dreams)

Any practices starts with Intention! In a sexual practice you need to ask yourself and if you have a partner, your partner what you would like to set the intention of?

  • Are you wanting to become closer as a couple?
  • Are you wanting to draw into your life a lover?
  • Do you want to feel fulfilled sexually?
  • Increase pleasure?
  • Create a dream life? etc.

Once your intent is set mentally, take a few deep breaths into your lower abdominal area, allow your belly to balloon out, I refer to this as your buddah belly. Pull the intent from your minds eye don your core, into your buddah belly and then as you release the breath feel the intent moving up your spine and into your heart where it expands and takes over your entire body. Do this 3-5 times, each time increasing the expansion of the intent. really feel it. What does life feel like when you embrace living this intent? If you have a partner at this time you should both be seated comfortably, facing each other with your hands on each other chests (heart chakras).

The next step to a Sexual Practice is to Activate Your Body. Activation is key because often in life we tend to loose sensation/feeling to life. We block out pain and thus block out pleasure. Sexual practices help people to regain sensation and reprogram the body so that it can full experience and express.  Without activation an intent remains only a thought, but through activating the senses and learning to open up to life we can move toward our desires.

Activation techniques:

  • Exercise
  • Dance
  • Shaking the body
  • Tensing and releasing the bodies muscles
  • Sensual touch
  • Thai Massage

If you are sitting with your partner this  is a good time to take turns softly stating a body part. Start with your feet and move upward. You can do this is a sitting position or laying down comfortably. If alone slowly move yourself from feet to head while focusing on each body part. As you focus on a body part (left foot, right leg, stomach, chest, shoulders, etc.) tense it with your inhale and then release the tenion with your exhale. Once you have moved your focus through your whole body take a deep breath and tense your entire being then release.  You may feel like shaking the body some. After you shake go internally and feel the vibrations of your life force energy pulsing through your physical being. You are activating.

Once your body is activated it is time to Still the Mind. Granted thought always travels through us the key to “stilling the mind” is to not attach to any of the thought. Watch the thoughts pass through as though you were watching a movie screen. These thoughts do not all come from you, many if not most are coming in from the matrix of all of life and time. These thoughts are completely harmless and can do nothing unless you attach and believe them. The biggest issue humankind has is that believe thought and accept it as our own. We tie ourselves to something that is not even a reality until we marry it. Walking down the path of commitment with a thought that is not from our soul desire is much like going to Las Vegas, getting drunk and waking up the next morning married to a stranger who is now laying next to us in bed and expecting the vowels of our drunken stooper to  be endearing. It is very easy to attach to a thought and it is very easy to watch a thought pass by, but once we have attached it is damn hard to undo the legal abiding paperwork.

In order to manifest your intent (desire) you must learn to still your mind and NOT attach to other thought.

Method’s of Clearing Mind Chatter:

  • meditation
  • deep breathing together or solo (when you focus on your breath and its flow you cannot help but clear the mind. You are being present in the breath.)
  • Couple’s can spoon each other while deep breathing together.

If you are coupled, try synchronizing your breath, then alternate your breath. Do each of these 5-10 times. Exhale with an AWH, so that you fully feel your breath and also share with your partner that you are exhaling. This also opens communication. Breathe in unison.

Solo or coupled: Place the tip of your tounge on the roof of your mouth. Hold it there while breathing to complete the energy circuit of your breath in the body.

Breathe in and out of the nose.

Once you have set your intent, activated your body and then stilled your mind it is time to Arouse Your Sexual Energy!

Our sexual energy is the catalyst to our dreams manifesting. If you look out into this world you will see most of humankind suppressing their desires, their dreams and their sexual energy. Because we are taught that it is not okay to be sexual beings we restrict our true power of being human. If we were meant to be like other mammals on the planet then we would only mate for off spring and we would have a set cycle for this, we would not experience orgasm or ans joy in the mating process. A kiss or touch would not mean so much and certainly not cause the wondrous sensations that they do. But we were not designed to have sexual energy just for the making of babies! We were given bodies that can experience bliss and through our connection with bliss we can manifest our desires. We can set an intent, a goal or visualize a dream and we can supercharge it with our creative life force energy: Our Sex!

Methods of Arousal:

  • Masturbation (but not to climax)
  • Intercourse (but not to climax)
  • Erotic Massage and Play

What feels REALLY arousing to you? We have our turn on’s.

If you are coupled or not an easy exercise is to bring your awareness to your genitals with your eye’s closed. Focus on your root chakra (men this is located between your scrotum and your anus, women this is in your vagina on the back wall), on your inhale contract these muscles and on your exhale release these muscles. Do this 3-5 times. Place a hand or your lovers hand on your genitals now (clothed or not) start to rotate your hips, side to side, back and forth, up and down as though you were making love. Add in some thrusting and sounds as though you were really engaged in sex. Feel your genitals. Focus on the energy/vibration that you feel there, the heat. If you want this is a good place to actually engage further into lovemaking if you have not with yourself or a partner.

The next step to your Sexual Practice is to Transmute Your Sexual Energy.

This means to move the energy that you have aroused and accumulated in your sex organs throughout your entire body. Simple ways to do this are:

  • Breathing
  • Touch Points (Acupressure)
  • Muscle Contractions
  • Visualization

If you are masturbating, making love or just practicing this arousal in a PG fashion with your clothes on in a group environment or outside in nature someplace, at this time contract your root chakra and hold the tension in the muscle. Breathe deep as you can into your groin and buddha belly. When you feel you can take in no more air, take one more sniff and then slowly exhale. Then breath in deep for a 3-5 breaths where you bring air in through your nose, down your front side into your belly and groin and the squeeze your root and let the air travel up your spine, into your head and out through your mouth. Feel your sex becoming more awake, ALIVE, Aroused, Unbound!!!!!!!

You can visualize the energy releasing from your head and spraying out into the universe, birthing your desires (intent) or if you are masturbating or making love with a partner this is the time to bring yourselves to orgasm. Remember though to not get lost in the physical sensations or thoughts/fantasies that are not part of YOUR intent. You must remain present and focused. Fully feeling, fully pressing forward with your lover or self into an orgasmic state of bliss and manifestation. Pull yourself into your heart and fully feel your lover, yourself, your intent. You can choose to release your energy here as you breathe deep and feel your intent manifesting or you can pause and decide to play in this space weather it be for a few moments with your lover or to slow down your sexing and take this incredible energy out into the world space with you and play with it there.

Playing in this Space is all about living and experiencing from the heart center instead of the groin. The above exercises can bring your sexual energy into your heart where  it can be increased by 5,000 fold or more. This allows you to feel deeper into love and into life, expand your sexual energy and use it not just for physical pleasure but for creation of a dream life. In this state of being your body is naturally producing more yummie chemicals that keep you activated in a higher vibration such as oxytocin and PEA. These chemicals are what makes us fall in love, feel bonding and connection and open us to further desire and creation. If you decide to complete your practice in sexual climax or orgasm alone or with your partner you will be super charged from these steps to continue your practice and play into your day and out in the world. Feeling this intense yummie energy rise up from your sex and travel through your body, attaching it to your conscious intention and allowing the life changing vibrations at the cellular level to help you unfold your Unbound Dream Life will bring you into the playing filed of many great leaders of today and times gone by. You can learn more about the power of Transmuting Your Sexual Energy in in the book Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill.

–KW (Musing is an Overview of a recent Satsang offered through Tantric Transformation)

 

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The Eneregtics of Heart Disease

 

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Heart disease covers a wide range of conditions from heart attacks, to vascular issues, high blood pressure to strokes. In fact, heart disease is the number 1 killer in many developed nations. There are many promising lifestyle interventions that can help treat heart disease, but it is important to understand the energetics of it as well. We speak of the heart often in emotional terms, because on some level we appreciate that the heart is more than a pump or an organ. In fact, it is the point of intersection that connects us to all living things.

The Biology of Heart Disease

The function of the heart is to move the blood through the body. In this continual transport process the blood delivers much needed oxygen, nutrients and Prana to the body. Over time, with continued vascular constriction, an increase in pressure and workload, the heart is no longer able to satisfy the metabolic requirements of the body. From a purely physiological standpoint, the heart becomes ineffective in energy production, transfer and utilization. Interesting how energy implications exist on every level, however, this isn’t the whole story. While these biological mechanisms play a key role, it in itself does not guaranteed heart disease.

In fact, research has been around for decades that love and social relationships have a protective effect when it comes to heart disease. You can take two evenly matched individuals, with the same background and risk factors with one difference. One has a loving home to go to at the end of the day and the other goes home to an unloving and emotionally toxic environment. The person with the loving home will have a lower incidence of heart disease. As we explore this connection we can begin to understand why the energetics are so important.

Following Your Heart

The brain and the heart interact in a very interesting way. If you were to consider the question, ‘where does emotion reside, in the heart or the brain?’ The answer is both. The heart and the brain are inextricably connected; many of the same neural structures that exist in the brain are also present in the heart. Imagine that emotions are pulses of pure energy that do not originate from the body, but rather sensed by the heart from the outer field of consciousness. The brain then interprets those pulses of energy and assigns judgment based on previous experiences stored in the subconscious.

The emotion itself is a frequency that exists somewhere on a continuum. The reason this is important is that those value judgments change the frequency and coherence of our heart based on the interpretation rendered by our minds. Now what happens if we were to bypass the ego mind or the trickery of the subconscious and just tune into the frequency sensed by the heart? Is this not the source of our pure intuition? Conversely, what effect does it have when we don’t listen to our hearts?

Bringing Down the Vibration

One of the tenants of Energy medicine is that all disease starts out in the energy field first and moves its way toward the body. Once it reaches the body, this is where we begin to see physical manifestations or symptoms. Disease is a result of continued vibration at a less than optimal frequency. So you can imagine there is nothing more detrimental to the heart than thoughts of isolation, jealousy, hostility and loneliness. Remember, if those feelings are a combination of a heart/mind interaction, what role did your subconscious and/or your ego play in the creation of those low vibrational thoughts? When the heart, mind and body are all in alignment that is called Coherence. The heart cannot be in coherence without a loving intention. Research done by HeartMath has shown us that we strive for coherence not only within ourselves, in our relationships, but with the earth as well. So when a person lives out of alignment; a life without joy and purpose or meaningful relationships, you can see that those low vibrational frequencies will weigh heavy on the heart. From an energetic perspective this is the foundation of heart disease.

Are You Creating a Bridge to Nowhere

Coherence between the mind/body and heart cannot be achieved without a heart focus, a conscious breath and a loving intention. In Yoga, breath is the bridge between our conscious and unconscious. It is a union of body, mind and spirit. In Energy medicine, the heart is the bridge between the material and the spiritual. The center of our energy body. When a break down in communication or incongruence exists between our physicality and our spirituality, we limit our ability for coherence and higher vibrational frequencies such as love.

Why Lifestyle Matters

You may ask yourself, why making enduring lifestyle changes can have such a positive impact on the heart, if it is a matter of energetics? The answer is that the lifestyle choices are a matter of energetics as well. One of the best lifestyle choices someone can make is a change in diet. If you look at the energetics of a heart healthy diet, it primarily relies on lighter, higher vibrational foods. Creating a better vibrational match between the food, our bodies and the heart. Whole foods have far more life force in them then processed ones. Since our hearts are connected to the earth, we should also consider the impact of our inhumane methods of food production, which greatly degrades the Earth’s energy field.

Exercise and stress reductions are other important interventions when it comes to heart disease, and there are good energetic reasons for this as well. Exercise can have the most profound impact when it is done mindfully. For example, in exercise physiology, there is something called Steady State. You may have experienced this while running; that zone where you feel like you could run forever. In this state of active coherence there is a perfect balance between our oxygen needs and our demands. We are in perfect alignment in that moment as long as we are mindful. Stress reduction usually revolves around mindful breathing, awareness development and calming the mind. We bring our awareness into the present which mitigates the impact of our mind made anxieties. Anytime we are present we decrease the impact of the ego mind. There is also a commonality that exists amongst all three because by consciously engaging in self-care, there is no higher act of self-love.

Opening the Heart

Being able to give and receive love openly is imperative for the health of the heart. Self-love is where it all has to start. Our hearts cannot be healed, if it holds no love for one’s self. The second quality of an open heart is one that forgives. Anytime we create resistance or congestion with lower vibrational thoughts we move ourselves out of coherence. Acts of service are another way to boost empathy and compassion and it creates an energetic investment that has a very high return. So appreciate your heart as more than a pump and consider the ways in which you can bring more coherence into your life and consciously heal your heart.

Original Post on OM Times

Angela Levesque is health educator, writer, exercise physiologist and energy healer. She hosts a weekly online radio show called On Health & Healing with Angela Levesque on a2zen.fm. Angela teaches several classes on self care, meditation & weight loss. Visit www.hestiahealth.com for more information. Follow her on https://twitter.com/HestiaHealth and http://www.facebook.com/hestiahealth

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Healing Marilyn Monroe

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So often women face challenges that men just simply cannot understand. Many of us having grown up with some form of sexual trauma or another, lost love, low self-esteem, a lack of understanding of our own bodies, emotions and ability to stand strong in the great feminine among other things and our sexuality causes us to be scared of intimate relationships. I recently heard that an average of 60% of the population has experienced or will experience some form of sexual abuse. This is a high number!  Sad but caused by the predators fantasies, insecurities and thus egoic attempts to control, take and dominate their victims in some sexual fashion. For those who have suffered rape in some form or another, sexual abuse from someone they loved/trusted or a stranger, they find themselves sexually bullied by another. Often the violator does not realize what they have done, the damage they have caused, the roadblocks in peoples lives that they have installed. They may assume that it was theirs for the taking or owed to them for some reason, even asked for. Often this can even happen in marriages or love relationships as well. These cases are even more so taboo to speak of in our society but are causing darkness in our world.  

For women, weather they are awake spiritually or not, sex is not the same as it for a man. As women, we are the ones who have to open

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ourselves, be vulnerable, be penetrated. Sex takes place inside us. It can bring us to great heights of pleasure yes, but only when done in love, trust and willingness can the women experience a taste of heaven. Sex is VERY spiritual! It is also extremely emotional, and psychological.  Even when a women lays down with her lover or spouse and falls into the trap of “duty sex” it is far beyond skin on skin friction to her. In these instances it is emotionally, physically, spiritually and psychologically damaging to her. She becomes a victim of the event. She becomes a victim to her penetrator, even if she loves and trusts him. She becomes a prisoner within herself.  This sort of sexual trauma, as well as typical rape cases, molestation, physical abuse, mental and emotional abuse and the sheer fact that as a society we shun and hush any open talk about the effects this plays on the female population in a whole has caused women to shut down. To diminish their great light in this world and to trust their male counterparts wholly. The female spirit of the world consciousness is damaged from the over run abuse that the female population has carried for thousands of years if not more. As the consciousness of our plant switches, as we transcend through the cosmic storms of the universe and the astrological alignments and make way into the dawning of a new reality, one on the bright side of dooms day prophecies, we MUST heal our sex.  

In my working mainly with men, over the course of my practice so far; I have learned that the majority are longing for the intimacy lost in their relationships. Connection and touch being at the peak of what they crave. As men become more consciously aware of the damage of the female energies in this world and the role the man has played in it, they also awaken to new feelings within themselves. They can start to connect first internally to the feminine energies that they too house. The healing of the ying/yang in our internal worlds is the starting point for ALL physical, emotional, spiritual and mental healing. Quantum Core Energetix and other forms of energetic bodywork are specially designed to help attune the cellular levels of the body so that it vibrates at a new frequency and the energy centers (Chakras) can spin freely and properly move the life force energy. These types of healing touch practices also clear out the physical storage of traumas. Great emotional releases happen. Acceptance for oneself, the path we have walked and are walking, the people in our lives and forgiveness toward ourselves and others all manifest through such healing works.    

I have been blessed to work with many incredible gentlemen over the course of my practice. The honor they bring is amazing. The open and loving hearts and souls. I feel extremely blessed to be a part of so many divine gentleman’s lives. Hearing about their trials and tribulations, the birth of new events, businesses, relationships and awakenings of purpose are only the tip of the ice berg of connection that I enjoy with so many. Often I find myself feeling not just like a practitioner with these souls but like a friend or comrade. Someone that is there to lend an ear, a new chalk board of ideas, unconditional love and friendship even. I can honestly say that I love all of my clients. Even the ones who have tested my waters of patience. Even the ones that I have had the obligation to fire because they could not withstand the ego and allowed their self-limited consciousness to manifest in negative groping behaviour. I honestly hold no ill will toward anyone, but instead find myself being asked to take seat in a new quest.  

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The quest to heal the Goddess. If men are to ever experience the intimacy that they so long for, the ability to feel like “real men” again and to learn to not take but to receive, then healing of the great feminine must take place. Women need to be confident enough to make eye contact with a man in the grocery store and not feel like he will approach her for a date or make some inappropriate comment. Women must learn again how to dance in the feminine energy and allow men to open doors for them, to give an appropriate compliment and it not be perceived as sexual harassment. Women must learn to trust in themselves and to embrace their sexuality in fullness. To allow the inner goddess, the Marilyn Monroe  and the Mother Theresa of our souls out to shine unconditional love, acceptance, nurturing, sexual confidence, spiritual power and the inner child of joy and happiness on this world.

      It is sad but true, and even a blind man can see it, women in the world are buying into self-victimization of their bodies, their desires, and their souls. They are allowing the deepening of the pain and believing that they can mask it with anti-depressants, alcohol, affairs, commitments to surface level events, gossip, religion, and many OCD cover ups. As a women throws herself into bleaching the baseboards for the third time in the month, and increases her commitment to the PTA of her child’s school, changes her anti-depressant medicine because the last one was not quiet good enough and further blinds herself with the newest reality TV show and a glass of her favorite wine, she is supporting her prison. This is all masking. This is NOT the life of a goddess, it is not the life the Creator wants any of us to live. It is a hopeless attempt to survive instead of transform our pain.      

      Transformation starts with rage. Yes, I said rage. First we have to allow ourselves to feel the anger, the sadness, the barried emotions. We have to allow our inner dragons to storm the village of our fears so that they can fly us to the highest heights of heaven after. As we learn to see and even embrace our shadow lands we to will see the light. For where the greatest darkness is so is the greatest light. We are each a diamond in the rough. The pressure that has been applied to us has happened for a reason. No matter how dark our trouble may seem in the moment it is falling on us, no matter how the memories of the traumatic events bring rise to tears, a speedy heart beat, or stomach ache, even anger, it is all a gift. It is up to each “victim” to see that they are not a victim, they are not a survivor, they are a Goddess in training. Only through our own pain, our own tears and bloodshed can we learn to fully embrace another unconditionally. When we learn to support, unconditionally love and accept ourselves and all our shit with it, can we truly be able to do the same for another at a deep level. It is true you can NEVER understand another until you have walked a mile in their shoes. Life provides us with these opportunities so that we can each step forward into the light of transformation so that we can find our calling, our purpose, our “Work of Love” that will help the transition of our planet into more peaceful times.    

As women, we must realize that we are naturally more in tune to the spiritual aspects of life then men. We each have chosen to come here to help the men in our lives evolve into greater, more loving and conscious souls. It is OUR obligation to Heal Our Sex so that our men can be birthed into the Great Divine and the further Awakening of this planet can happen.  

From my Sexual Healing Soul to Yours, Namaste’

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